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And let that be known. I already told you all about the news, and what I found next was even more than I had blogged about. A surprise beyond surprises. A surprise good enough to land the cover story of the latest Nintendo Power! Lemme recap from my previous post about the news: “Back in the years of the twentieth century, there was a craze that I’d like to call the “animation invasion” or the “cartoon boom”. This was a time where cartoons literally came into our world and ran wild, changing rules and righting wrongs. This era still echoes in our minds today, but there are some mass-media businesses that brought us the echo, most of them being stuff like Nickelodeon or Disney. Nickelodeon jumped into action in about the early to late 90s, and perhaps the early 2000s as well, introducing timeless classics like DougRocko’s Modern LifeCatDog, and, of course, SpongeBob (most likely the only creation during the cartoon boom that still runs today). But don’t forget about Disney and all they’ve done with bringing memorable characters to our time. Especially Mickey Mouse, and this brings up a new point. If you were a Wii owner headed in the right direction as of ’10, you might have picked up the M. Mouse game Epic Mickey. And, like usual, it triggered a swarm of rumors about a possible sequel. Well, everything you’ve heard is true.”

I already informed you about information like Epic Mickey officially receiving a sequel, and the tons of debuts the new sequel was gonna have: Oswald making his playable debut, the series making its debut on console and computer alike, the new modes in the game, its plot and list of tentative titles, and even its possible date: holiday 2012. Well, you’re about to add more to what you already know, because Epic Mickey and company are coming back later this year, but not in just one sequel, but two! The NP cover story issue isn’t hitting the markets until tomorrow, so be lucky I’ve got this exclusive info for you. The two sequels will be The Power of Two for the Wii, and The Power of Illusion for the 3DS. Get your paint and thinner ready, folks—you’re getting more opportunity than you even bargained for.

Although I showed you four possible covers for the game that were competing for the ultimate and official title, they basically all lost to another cover that I honestly believe doesn’t parallel as much, but is still kinda cool.

But, hey—what the creators must announce is what the fans must anticipate. Anyway, let’s talk a bit about The Power of Two, the more-known-about sequel of the two, the one that actually has a Wikipedia article. The platform range for this game have branched out tremendously, abandoning the concept of being just a Wii-exclusive title. It is now available for the Mac OS X, the PC, and the three rivals of the seventh generation of gaming: the PS3, Wii, and X360. Now that’s a severe case of irony. The excitement first kindled thanks to Destructoid when they put up an article last summer speculating the sequel and its possible covers. The rumors inched closer to reality when the French division of Disney as well as game designer Warren Spector invited the French to an “epic project”  comencing in late March 2012. The rumors came even closer when Nintendo Power announced, at the end of their March ’12 issue, that their next issue in April would have a “top-secret” preview, and this is what that would look like if you actually read the last page:

Can you tell what those things at the bottom are?…

GameTrailers also stated that their March 22, 2012 episode would involve a “world-exclusive preview of Warren Spector’s new epic adventure”, and it would be “notably significant.” Tons of clues and mind-boggles later, Warren finally confirmed that the rumors were true on the 21st, and that the title of the game would be Power of Two, and would feature new parts of the city as well as old ones ruined by earthquakes and other natural disasters. But luckily, for us, I confirmed this information even earlier. Not to be a showoff. Warren said that over 700 people would be part of the sequel’s crew, and that over a thousand alters were made to the camera issues that were criticized in the first game. Now, about the plot.

Taking place some time after the original title, the Mad Doctor (whom Mickey had defeated in the original), mysteriously returns to the Wasteland, despite being presumably blown up in the original game. [This reminds me about a metaphor you could always use in these peculiar situations: when Kenny dies in South Park, he almost always comes back for the next episode he appears in.] Claiming to have realized the error of his ways, ironically enough, he offers to work alongside Oswald and other Wasteland residents to mend the damage caused by earthquakes in order to make a few amends.

Giving him the benefit of the doubt, Oswald accepts the Mad Doctor’s helpful plan for the city. However, not long after this, the Wasteland suffers even more wear-and-tear than before, and suspicion rises that the Mad Doctor is not keeping to his own truth. Gus the Gremlin, Oswald’s buddy advisor, and his girlfriend Ortensia (confirming that rabbits can actually have love lives), all come to a conclusion: “When there’s something strange in the neighborhood, who we gonna call? MICKEY MOUSE!” And apparently this is the best possible plan since Mickey had saved Wasteland in 2010. Mickey climbs through the same mirror that he did in 2010, retrieves his magical paint-and-thinner brush from Yen Sid’s workshop, after having it taken away at the end of–gee, this game has a lot of tie-ins to its predecessor, doesn’t it? With the help of Gus, Mickey returns to the corrupted Wasteland to uncover the truth behind the Mad Doctor’s “little white lie”, with Oswald as a sidekick along the way.

And indeed, they discover that the Mad Doctor had tricked them, using his helpful offer as an excuse to create and release his new works known as “Blotworx” into the already troubled districts, hybrids of the original game’s Blotlings and Beetleworx. Realizing his mistake that could cost him the life of the city, Oswald becomes Mickey’s assist in taking down the Mad Doctor once again to fix a mess he himself had started.

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For Wii users, your game will be developed by Junction Point Studios, but for PS3 and X360 users, yours will be from Blitz Games. For everyone, it will be published by Disney and distributed by Buena Vista, running under the Gamebryo engine, used by companies like 2K Games, Ubisoft, and Sony. Instead of coming out in the holidays of the year, it will instead come around the fall season in September. Waiting 5 months isn’t all that bad, is it? If you can’t wait, you can always hitch up the Nintendo Power April issue and get your fix before the primetime release.

Yep, this is the final cover art. Not some fake that I made to be show-y…POST APRIL FOOLS! You totally fell for that, didn’t you? Yeah, this is just a fake I made, but at least it looks cool. And, Disney, if you’re coming up with a cover for Power of Illusion, you could always use mine under my 100% permission, but only with 5% of the game’s financial revenues. Anyway, Power of Illusion will be an apparent 3DS-exclusive Epic Mickey sequel, and it will probably be the second of the two sequels, as its date is not yet determined. So, the game is basically a sequel’s sequel. This time, a company named Dreamrift will be grabbing the reins of development, and Peter Ong will be designing, but Disney and Buena Vista still have their jobs. It is not yet known what engine it will run on, but it has been spreading that the sequel will possibly be running under hand-drawn sprites and scrolling backgrounds, which Spector has confirmed as true.

The plot for this game is completely irrelevant with that of The Power of Two, but still takes place after the original game. In this, the evil witch Mizrable (good name), and her Castle of Illusion, have accidentally been transported to the Wasteland thanks to the wizard Yen Sid, the same guy with the workshop Mickey got his brush back from in Power of Two. Oswald tells Mickey the news, but also adds that Minnie Mouse has been detected inside. So now, for his second sequel, the two are on a mission to save not only Minnie, but the “Illusions” of other trapped Disney characters inside the castle.

The 3DS mechanics of the game basically resemble the game Scribblenauts; where you must write out words to convert them into real objects. In this game, you must trace out those objects to bring them to existence. And for people who aren’t the best illustrators, that’s a bad thing, since the quality of your drawings reflect on the quality of the drawn object. Nintendo Power used a cannon as an example. A well-traced cannon will only inflict harm on enemies, but a badly traced cannon can inflict harm on everyone else, even Mickey! Each stage of the game will resemble a different Disney animated feature. Some announced ones include Peter PanSleeping Beauty, and even Tangled.

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So are you excited for these sequels? I know I’ll be checking the ratings in September this year to see if I should pick it up! Anyway, I’ll give you one last thing to participate in before you leave. Mwak out.

- Sam

p.s. Time for our Would You Rather o’ the Week! Would you rather…every time you go #1 in the bathroom, it lights on fire, or every time you go #2, it blows up?



Hey guys it’s Sam, and we all know that when you usually can’t find out about some source, you dive into your local library, in school or not, or try to trust online sources. And as we all know, you can’t trust anyone from the mouth, so should you be able to trust someone from the keyboard? Either way, you’re definitely gonna learn something today, because I’m gonna be teaching you about one of gaming’s biggest icons and mascots. Here are a couple hints: he’s short, pudgy, has a bushy mustache, wears a red cap, and has blue overalls. Does it ring a bell? He’s one of Nintendo’s most famed, familiar, and simply best characters ever created under Shigeru Miyamoto’s name. He is Mario, one of the coolest, sweetest plumbers I’ve seen…well, the only plumber I’ve seen.

Our beloved Red Rivet (c’mon, the Blue Blur was a sweet-enough nickname for Sonic) actually did not debut in the classic Super Mario Bros in ’85, nor was it Mario Bros in ’83, but it was actually Donkey Kong in ’81. In that platformer-pioneering game, Mario was originally known as Jumpman, and he was originally intended to make his way up to his kidnapped girlfriend and defeat his own pet ape that turned against him after mistreatment. In this game, Mario was only a carpenter, and his profession was altered in Mario Bros to the plumber he is today. Mario was given such bright clothing, like his overalls, to make sure his actions were visualized. His red cap came in because the limited mid-80s video game programming animation made it difficult for enabling Mario’s hair to wave when he jumped. Mario jumped into the platformer kind of game after originally being set to escape a maze lacking the ability to jump. Miyamoto, the man that created Mario in the first place, gave him a new genre tone because “if you had a barrel rolling towards you, what would you do?”

Miyamoto conceived Mario in the first place while developing Donkey Kong (no big surprise there), trying to think of a title that could sum up for all of Nintendo’s past coin-op failures, such as the game Sheriff. What is Sheriff? Well, exactly. Mario’s full name has not been fully announced by Nintendo, although it is not “Mario Mario”, despite the inference of the Mario Bros. series title, its use in the ’93 movie, and info from the Prima guidebook for Superstar Saga.

Title says all. The games in their chronological orders are: MARIO BROS. (1981), SUPER MARIO BROS. (1985), SUPER MARIO BROS. 2 (1987), SUPER MARIO BROS. 3 (1990), SUPER MARIO WORLD (1991), SUPER MARIO 64 (1996), SUPER MARIO SUNSHINE (2002), SUPER SMASH BROS. BRAWL (2008).

Mario originally intended to be named “Mr. Video”, and was also planned to appear in every Nintendo game that hit the markets. But the idea of the name “Mr. Video” was scrapped because Miyamoto believed that this name would make our hero “[disappear] off the face of the Earth.” And it was one regular day in 1981 for Nintendo, and they were hosting a meeting trying to conceive a name in time for a game’s release. Suddenly, their landlord burst in, angrily demanding and confronting that they pay for a long-overdue rent they had gotten far behind in. That landlord’s name was Segali…Mario Segali. And it was after this being that our precious plumber got his name, as long as Segali received his share of cash. Believe me, mister…your name did more than just christen a plumber.

Mario has since appeared in several kinds of games, including racing (Mario Kart series), puzzle, party (Mario Party series), role-playing (Super Mario RPG: Legend of the Seven Stars), fighting (Super Smash Bros. series), and sports (Mario Tennis, Mario Golf, Mario Super Sluggers, Super Mario Strikers, etc.).

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Here is some stuff I bet you didn’t even know about Mario. When you find out about this, you’ll be totally fascinated. I should know. I’m the person that’s giving it to you!

  • The notorious antagonist of the Mario saga, Bowser, was originally sketched out as an ox by Miyamoto, but accidental interpretation by a fellow animator turned him into a turtle after the two worked on it. And honestly, I think being a turtle fits Bowser way better, compared to the species of usual Mario enemies.
  • Recurring character Birdo, supposedly Yoshi’s love interest, is somewhat officially a dude, as stated in the Mario 2 instruction booklet.
  • The name of “Wario”, the malevolent yin to Mario’s gallant yang, was derived from the Japanese word “warui”, meaning “bad”. Both were either way voiced by Charles Martinet, who has been giving Mario the spice to his voice for 17 years now. The same thing most likely applies to Luigi’s yin Waluigi.
  • Koji Kondo, the rightful composer and sound arranger/advisor of 13 Mario titles, has had music that is known worldwide, especially the Super Mario Bros theme and its countless fan-made renditions. Heck, there was even a Mariorock opera back in ’03! Other titles he has composed for or done work for include the original Legend of Zelda among other LoZ titles, the original PilotwingsStar Fox and its N64 reboot, and the original NES Golf and Soccer.
  • Super Mario Bros. obviously enough used to hold the title of the most bestselling game in history with 40.24 million units, until it was degraded to 2nd place in 2006 by the Wii’s launch title Wii Sports. Nintendo making the two most bestselling games created? It’s like James Cameron directing the two highest-grossing movies created.
  • In 1999, Mario Golf hit the markets 3 years after Super Mario 64 pretty much made gaming history. Believe it or not, this was not the first golfing game starring Mario. There was a character resembling Mario in the original NES Golf, but he surely made an official appearance later in NES Open Tournament Golf, as well as Luigi, and Princesses Peach and Daisy.
  • Princess Peach has appeared in more games than any other female game character in gaming history, even people you’d suppose, like Samus Aran or Chun-Li. She was also originally known as Princess Toadstool ever since her debut in ’85, and, in the west (aka us), she held that name for 8 years until it was changed permanently in Yoshi’s Safari.

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So THIS is the currency system in Mushroom Kingdom. Hey, could you hook me up with, like, 30 of those?

‘Twas pretty fascinating, huh? Oh, back to our learning.

Mario also had a career outside of his namesake series. That’s right, folks, Mario also had a non-Mario life. Surprisingly enough, he serves as the referee of Mike Tyson’s Punch-Out!, and he is also playable in NBA Street V3 and SSX: On Tour, both by EA. He also makes cameos in both A Link to the Past and Ocarina of Time as a portrait, and in Metal Gear Solid: The Twin Snakes, he appears as a minuscule statue. So all the peeps that own some or all of these games, ya better start keeping an eye out if you haven’t been already! According to kids, Mario is a more known icon than even Mickey Mouse, and that dude’s hard to beat. Mario has appeared in over 200 games since his debut, but it would probably take up a lot of space counting them all. See why this is only part one? And speaking of part one, looks like this is the end of part one!

But don’t worry! If you like, rate, comment, and jump on dat subscribe button’s head regularly, part two will come sooner than you think. Trust me, behind the dashboard, it’s almost always rush hour. Anyway, thanks for watching our show! Now, if you’ll excuse me, I got some 64-bit racing to get to. Now, if only I could stop slipping on that banana!…

- Sam

Question o’ The Day: If you could come up with and interpret any idea for a Mario power-up concept, what new power-up would you conceive?

p.s. Bro, Mario is literally my research paper topic! No, literally, he is, and I got a load of online sources to prove it. That stuff is so thick, I could literally write a novel with all that info! But of course, that’s some sort of copyright violation, isn’t it? I hope I used the right sources, and I also don’t think there’s much informational books about Mario out now, is there? But honestly, isn’t Mario such a good topic? I could’ve chosen Link or Samus or Fox McCloud, but I specifically chose Mario, and that’s all that matters…

(p.p.s. If you subscribe, I’ll stop talking so much!)



Hey guys it’s Sam, and I’ve gotten into a little curveball on blogging schedules. I haven’t exactly been up with schedules to date. Why? Because I’ve been sick. With Bieber fe–no, seriously. I’m not joking. My nose is running like the Niagara, and my throat hurts more than an iron maiden torture device. Okay, maybe I was exaggerating on that, but I’m under legitimate illness. (Take a pause to sneeze) Sorry.

And since the 2011-2012 school year has begun, Sammwak is falling under its biggest shadow….one post a week! Sorry folks, but what a father says happens. And to think that I released five posts a day when I started this blog. So starting today, Sammwak is breaking down to one post a week, and one post only. Still really sorry. But you can still check back to Sammwak every Monday for “more where that came from!”

- Sam

p.s. This blog was shown to some of my aunt’s hospital workers, and they don’t believe that this is by just a 10-year old! Fight the power of the writing curriculum, baby!



Hey guys it’s Sam and after a long, postless week of waking up early and preparing for school, I can kick back on my first Friday and deliver you the daily juice–daily gaming juice, that is. Yessiree, Game n Vote is getting picked up, slapped several times, and put back on Sammwak! Today, we put our hands down and ball them into fists as we enter the tournament of one of Addicting Games’ most…well, addicting games (also, at 94%, one of the most acclaimed), Electric Man 2.

A blue Electric Man delivers a powerful kick that sends a Pyromaniac flying near another already-defeated Pyromaniac.

Electric Man 2HS: The Tournament of Voltagen (much more commonly abbreviated as Electric Man 2, or also EM2), rated Tween+, started off just as “some fighting game” back in the start of 2007. But as time went, the game currently has almost twenty million plays, and I don’t know if that’s just in the country, or even around the world. (Speaking of EM2, why is it number two if we never knew number one?) The storyline follows the namesake tournament of Voltagen, described at the start screen of the game as:

“…where combat teams of varying numbers compete against each other to determine the most powerful being in the stick man universe. The current champion has never been beaten. Any combination of martial arts, street fighting, and superhuman powers can be used to wipe out your opponents. Let the games begin…”

You play a stick man with tushie-kicking powers, as well as an electric glow engulfing him (the color can be adjusted). The challenges range from the robotic warriors, the Replicants, to the disabled but able, the Blind, and everyone in between. I enjoy this game merely because it captures every aspect possible in an online fighting game. You have a good time fighting, not too much of a challenge comes up, and you even get to finish opponents in style with slow-mo moves. What more could you ask for?

Code:

:) – Good fact

:D – Very good fact

:/ – “Meh, I can deal with it” fact

:( – Bad fact

;( – Very bad fact

THE GOOD

  • Amazing online fighting capture :)
  • Even if they are stick men, the visuals are top-dog. :)
  • Very successful and precise fighting. :)
  • Slow-mo moves are the perfect touch to finishing opponents. Or just being cool. :D
  • Opponents do put up a precise amount of challenges. :)
  • Lots of range in the styles of opponents. (you don’t face the same style of person every time…unless they get harder.) :D
  • Helpful, but short, tutorial. :)
  • Impressive move lists. :D
  • Very short time to wait for the game to come up. :D

THE BAD

  • Only single-player; impossible to brawl against your friends. ;(
  • No free play, or free-fight, or whatever. You’re always in the competition, even if you want to take it easy. ;(
  • Even on easy, the challenge gets a little too hard. Only the master of the universe comes out alive on Pro. :(
  • Not much is known about the game’s background. :/

The game’s one of Addicting Games’ darlings, and that is a fact, but the game simply does not live up to the perfect expectations. Nobody’s perfect, and same rule for games. But Electric Man 2 would’ve gotten more hits than “David after the Dentist” if it could’ve mended the holes it made.

Gameplay (do the controls turn out nifty?): A (5 points)

Entertainment (will the game keep you glued to your seat?): A- (4 points)

Smarts (does it know where it’s going, in terms of intelligence?): B+ (3 points)

AI (are the opponents perfect, just right, or plain cheap?): B (3 points)

Style (does the game amount to eye candy?): A- (4 points)

Final score: 19 out of 25

Recommendation: 4 out of 5 (near-perfect chance)

- Positive messages – Actually, there is one message that usual players don’t even think about learning: “If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again.”

- Good role models – You do stand-up? Because you’re making me blow an intestine…That wasn’t funny? Anyways, there’s probably only one role model in this game, and that’s Electric Man; every girl’s dream soul mate, a guy who can stand up for himself even if he has to fist-fly, a guy who always keeps brawling for more in the end, and one that stands up after defeat (that is Sagat‘s idea of a strong fighter).

- Violence – Oh, come on! It’s a fighting game; that’s what violence was built for! Sure you’re expecting why I didn’t give it five bombs out of five. The only reason I took one off is that the violence was…well, violent, but it wasn’t actually, in a way, bloody.

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I recommend this game to anyone who wants a good fighting game to spend their day with. Apparently, words with links in them are the new hot stuff; URLs are for chumps. So go here, here, or if you’re extra-picky today, here, to play the game. Can you beat the boss and become the new champion? Or will the only person getting beat is you, into coleslaw like you knead your dough?

Happy fighting.

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So you have determined your strength and returned to your base. Now to answer some questions…

Now, the only thing you have to do is check back for more Game n Votes right here on Sammwak, as well as the other things I put up here!

Sincerely yours,

Sam



That’s right. Hey guys, and for any of you who have actually checked out me and my brother’s channel , you’d know that we haven’t been up to date ever since our most recent video back in February 2011 (released five days before yours truly’s birthday), which only mustered seven thousand views, which is not even a fifth of the amount of views our most viral video get.]

Well, now over half a year later, we’ve finally released a new video in a beautifully brand-new format (just today)! Only seventy people have seen this greatness, and since the thousands start here at Sammwak, I thought that this would be the best way to spread the word. See it and replay it and replay it and replay it and replay it and replay it in awe! My brother is officially an After Effects master for doing this. Software takes people places, doesn’t it?

See, I told you it would be beautiful. And if you think you’ve woken up from this best dream ever, we’ll be releasing new videos all week under this format!…Okay, now you can wake up. ;)

Our fresh logo, and hopefully our fresh YouTube icon.

I’ve been cooking up tag-team ideas ever since we got this whole format thing down. I’ve got some pretty good ones down, and hopefully they’ll go from my WordPad to your computer screen. I’ve already told my friends on GMail’s Buzz about it, and maybe they’ll continue the buzz too…pun intended?

Anyways, keep checking back to OneByOne for slick new videos under this format. Speaking of slick videos, wanna check out our most viral video? (breaking the record at over 200,000 views)

I guess that’s all here from Sammwak. Just a quick shout-out to spread the news.

p.s. For my bonehead mistake of procrastinating on blogging times, I’ll be giving you a short span of posts every Monday, Friday, and Wednesday! That’s right, for just 2 weeks, Sammwak will be triweekly…starting, now!

p.p.s. Keep your eyes peeled for SSF4 charge character tutorials! (Anyone named Benny must be very happy right now.)



Hey guys. I’ve probably been making you undergo this formula every week on Sammwak: videos, videos, games, books breast cancer. Rinse and repeat. Well, now I’ve decided to rewind back to books, but I’m also rewinding back to a segment that I haven’t done in a long time on Sammwak. And that’s book reviewing. Considering the fact that I just turned out a couple books to and from Chicago just Wednesday, I’ve decided to bring them back right here on Sammwak. The one that I actually finished will be here today. This book was released February 1994, so that makes it approximately seventeen years old (older than my sister!). The next ride might be the last in the sixteenth installment in the popularly paranormal series, One Day at HorrorLand. (Fun fact: Do you know that Scholastic was 74 years old when they made this?)

SPOILER ALERT: For anyone who does not like their books spoiled, I suggest you roam elsewhere on the site.

RATED TV-PG: For people who don’t like severe horror and are easily nightmare-prone, I suggest you also roam elsewhere.

Front tagline: Enter if you dare….

Back tagline: The next ride might be their last…. (Which is a little old, but let’s go with them)

Description: The Morris family got lost trying to find Zoo Gardens Theme Park. But that’s okay. They found another amusement park instead. It’s called HorrorLand. In HorrorLand there are no crowds. No lines. And the admission is free. It seems like a pretty cool place. But that was before that heart-stopping ride on the deadly Doom Slide. And that terrifying experience in the House of Mirrors. Because there’s something weird about the rides in HorrorLand. Something a little too creepy. A little too real…

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This book was deeply squandered, repetitively and predictably unfunny, and…it breaks my heart to say this…scary. Perhaps this is one of the most original Goosebumps books to actually scare me even for a moment. As depicted in the description, it depicts around the Morris family: Dad, Mom, narrator Lizzy, her little brother Luke, and his friend Clay. This whole adventure all happens because a foolish dad forgot to pack the map. Driving out in scenic nowhere, they stumble across HorrorLand, “where nightmares come to life.” Just as they exit their car, guess what happens? It explodes. I’m not even joking. It explodes. Twisted metal and burning cinders are everywhere, much to Dad’s horror. He tries calling 911, but HorrorLand strictly prohibits phoning. Sad and unlucky day.

To save all the energy and muscle it takes to type out the whole literal story, let me break it down to you:

Doom SlideWarning! You May Be The One To Slide To Your Doom! – How is it scary? Take the unlucky pick, and you might slide to your infinite doom. Pretty cheesy, huh? Lizzy, Luke, and Clay are the participants. Considerably, the slide basically has you sliding at the speed of light (maybe even faster) through fake fire, and then out you go. If that were a cartoon, you’d literally be flying over HorrorLand at this rate.

House of Mirrors - Reflect Before You Enter. No One May Ever See You Again! – How is it scary? The walls cave in on you, crushing you into a perfect human square? Lizzy, Luke, and Clay are also the participants. There are a bunch of mirrors everywhere. That’s it. Also try not to hurt yourself.

Coffin CruiserA Relaxing Float To The Grave. – How is it scary? You apparently lie down in coffins as you float on a brown water river, then the lids suddenly shut on you. That’s it. Everyone is a participant here.

Bat Barn – How is it scary? How do you think it’s scary? In the dark, a bajillion bats. That’s how it’s scary. Lizzy, Luke, and Clay are also the participants.

That’s pretty much HorrorLand in a nutshell.

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The Ending: After realizing they were the victims on the candid camera show HorrorLand Hidden Camera (more like Punk’d Monster Mix) that airs on the Monster Channel after 30 Monster Meals and viewed by 2 million beasts worldwide, the family goes through an obstacle course and sets a new record of all five surviving. They hitch a HorrorLand bus to drive home, but a monster was in the back the whole time…just to award them tickets for next year.

Memorable Cliffhanger Chapter Ending: Page 73, concluding chapter 15. The Morris parents have abandoned their children with a message: “Goodbye.”

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This book really had hopes and dreams. But how it turned out, those got roughly shattered. The premise got old fast (going to die? I prefer not, you’re OK), and so did its humor. The only thing that could stick around for literally half the amount of chapters was the horror…and I guess that’s a good thing. It just couldn’t last long enough to squeeze out the entertaining juices.

FINAL SCORE: 6.5/10 (a fair book)

CONCLUSION: If you know your Goosebumps, then this book would be more like One Day To BoreLand. But if you’re a newbie veteran, you might be interested into gazing at a few chapters. One Day To HorrorLand just fails to be fresh and entertaining, and that’s what so violently destroys it.’

- Sam

p.s. I like new challenges every day, so I’ve decided that a Spanish version of Sammwak may be launched sometime! (And yes, it will still be called Sammwak, because who’s heard of that word?) Even if it’s out for just a momento, I’m sure that any Spanish fans of this blog can understand it in their own lengua! (That’s Spanish for language.)



Hey guys, it’s Sam with another noob-pwnin’ good time on PWN SOME NOOBS! (Oh, you miss the stylization? It’s easier to do without.) I’m here to announce a brand new adventure this fall, on September 13 (it’ll be a Tuesday, guys). It used to be an Xbox Arcade game, but it do-si-doed onto a full retailer. Twisted Pixel (the studio behind the ‘Splosion Man duo) brought us the ultimate spaghetti Western journey. Become the true western puppeteer in…

You thought the Western subgenre of action-adventure had crippled since Fatshark’s Lead and Gold last year. You’re wrong, partner! Twisted Pixel took a break from its action-platforming comic world and decided to put on the ol’ cowboy hat. The game is set as an Old Western play. So the third-person shooter is played like it was acted out in a theater. (The sets are 2D pieces of wood, the zombie cowboy himself is just a puppet!) The beginning footage is actually live-action when people attend to see the play (shot at an Austin, TX theater). You play as the Gunstringer, an undead one-eyed marionette betrayed by his posse, and as he rises from his grave, he plans an unholy vengeance. (Dead-Eye Plankton all over again…) So you’re playing as a zombie cowboy…how convenient.

The day when your finger guns paid off.

The rating has been confirmed as T for Teen for blood, cartoon violence, drug reference, and sexual themes. (Kind of like western Sims.) So, you wanna know how the game works?

Left hand – Controls the Gunstringer’s movement.

Right hand – Aiming and firing the Gunstringer’s gun.

Left and right hands – During rail shooter moments of the game, they can both be used to handle two guns at once.

There’s also the element of marking multiple villains to fire, and all marked villains are shot with that handy gesture. This game will also come with codes to download the first DLC (Wavy Tube Man Chronicles), and Fruit Ninja Kinect.

HOW THE GAME MIGHT RULE

It’s like Rango died, came back from the grave, and embarked on another Western adventure. Maybe the whole mechanic will run swimmingly, and it will all result in a great spaghetti Western adventure. It looks good just by looking at the cover.

HOW IT MIGHT NOT

Question: Why would you ever make a motion-sensor shooter? It sounds a little weird. And the controls might completely wonk out and the game could have crumbled like the Pentagon during 9/11. Just saying…

CRITICS CALL

The reviews have been mostly positive with critics’ first hands-on perspectives of the game.

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I would consider buying this game if it’s that good of a romp. But dust off your finger guns and prepare for unholy battle in The Gunstringer, lassoing retailers everywhere this September. Check out this trailer to know the game a bit more!

So long, partner. We’ll do-si-do again on Sammwak, because the old saying goes: “If you get thrown from a horse, you have to get up and get back on, unless you landed on a cactus; then you have to roll around and scream in pain.”

Your cowboy,

Sam



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