Captain Underpants 9 & 10 Get The Real Shining Light


We haven’t seen any works of the waistband warrior from Dav Pilkey since The Preposterous Plight of the Purple Potty People six years ago. Yeah, yeah, you might already know how this is going, and you might ask “Sam, didn’t we already go over this?” And we may have already talked about this topic back on 2Sam2Mwak. The most recent excuse Dav put out there was that he was caring for his terminally ill grandpa. Well, although his grandpa is gleefully watching this post from *sniffle* that big bookstore in the sky :(, he is already halfway through his four-book Scholastic contract. And this is the penultimate book on the contract, something he bargained for–but we didn’t.

Apparently, Captain Underpants and the Terrifying Re-Turn of Tippy Tinkletrousers came out two months ago while summer was just starting to decay. While I expected it to be a bit more upcoming, I’ll just tell you now. Anyway, the premise of the story–if you didn’t already know–picks up where Preposterous Plight left off. The last time we saw George & Harold, they were being arrested and headed for the slammer. Then Harold spoke thirteen fateful words: ‘”What could be worse than going to jail for the rest of our lives?”, changing the course of time itself forever. Now, Captain Underpants 9 is the most innovative entry yet for various reasons–one of them being that part of the book serves as a prequel that takes us back to the “good ole kindergarten days”! Now, they’re not fighting aliens or scientists. Now, an afro-sporting George and a not-so-badly-haircut Harold are using brainpower to fight against Principal Krupp’s equally nasty nephew Kipper.

Now, let’s go to the (hopefully) real plot: Professor Poopypants (the main villain of the fourth book) had showed up after four books in some sort of limbo. He had taken it in after the defeat of his debut appearance to change his name–but that only made him a laughingstock of a jailbird. But now, he’s back for–most likely–revenge, and he’s got plenty of technological advantages up his sleeve. (One contraption from the last book left anyone who dared to laugh at his new name frozen solid. 8-o) Now, Captain’s had plenty of hard hits (including wedgies) in his past, but the return of an old villain? Totally new. Will this competition leave this scantily-clad superhero’s underwear in a bunch? Or will Tippy be forced to “poopy his pants” once more?

Now, since the book’s already out, it’s gotten pretty good feedback. Out of the 9 reviews I saw on Amazon, most people enjoyed the book for its returning laughs and unparalleled entertainment, but some people were more critical over elements like its ending. One specific review from Louisville, Kentucky gave it its only 2-star rating–due to it not actually having any underpants or Klingon in it. And let me inform you that the person that sent this review is a mother. A mother that needs to catch up on her Dav Pilkey.

“With reading, however, it’s a whole different story–we get involved. When we read a book, there aren’t any special effects. There’s no music to set the mood, and there’s no costume designers or set decorators. We have to fill in all those special details ourselves by using our imaginations. The simple fact is, the more we read, the more we get to use our imaginations. And the more we use our imaginations, the more powerful we become. So crack open a book and start reading, because reading really does give you super powers. And imagination is the greatest super power of all.”

- Dav Pilkey in his “Author Adventures” video on Amazon

Couldn’t have said those very words better myself. Anyway, you can check out Captain Underpants 9 when it hits bookstores on–oh yeah, it’s out right now. And a small little chunk of my mind is telling me you shouldn’t miss out on the opportunity. And if you don’t want to, you’ve already got plenty of dollars to save up for when the tenth installment (The Revolting Revenge of the Radioactive Robo-Boxers) comes out next January.

And in case you’re wondering, yes, Professor Poo–sorry, Tippy Tinkletrousers will be returning for this installment too! Even Sulu and Crackers will be coming back! Again! In this boo–er, first, try to imagine a world without underpants. Not only Captain, but likely undergarments in general. You’d be a dead duck if you got pantsed, and if you didn’t wipe good enough it would go straight to your pants. Anyway, this might be the future of Cap, as–er–something horrible happened to George & Harold. And why couldn’t C.U. pipe up and save them? Since Tippy and his tech-savvy hijinks had prevented the two from creating the waistband warrior to begin with! Now, having broken the yo-yo of time, George & Harold must figure out how to change changed time. It sounds ridick, but it has to happen–or else over a decade of gutbusting adventures will all be for naught. And I already saw a different version of the world as we know it in Preposterous Plight. Will the grandfather clock ever strike twelve? Find out when Revolting Revenge hits stores next year.

Stay classy, America.

~S~ 8-)

p.s. Speaking of future dates, Dav’s official website @ http://www.pilkey.com, is currently on hold due to all this Tippy Tinkletrousers madness. He stated that it would be up and running in “a few weeks”–but that’s what it says every time you visit the site.

Videos of the Week: If you tuned into my second chopped, screwed, squeezed, and crunched pack of news concerning Adventure Time‘s status in the DVD world, you might have checked out my Video of the Week. It was the first entry in Swoozie’s Cheating series, “Cheating in Middle School”. And if you laughed just as much as I expected you to, ya might wanna consider this 3.4 million-time viewed sequel.

And here’s something that might make old-time gamers crack a smile:

Plus that “Author Adventures” video I got that quote from:

Finn and Jake Go Back to the DVD World in JAKE VS. ME-MOW


The last time we met over this, we were discussing how Adventure Time had crunched their entire first season into a 2-disc DVD, and how Regular Show crunched their most memorable episodes into their “Slack Pack” DVD. Well, believe it or not, just hours after the release of that post, I found more news. And I was flabbergasted when I saw that I’d have to be making a sequel to my already successful original. No, Adventure Time‘s second season DVD hasn’t come out yet. And no, Regular Show hasn’t made a proper first season DVD yet. They’re season-jumping once more–and this time may be the best of all.

I don’t even KNOW how to describe this cover. Were they, like, holding an art contest and picked the most disgusting entry they found?

The upcoming Adventure Time pack, Jake vs. Me-Mow (the third pack yet to be named after an episode), is probably the most intriguing non-season DVD yet. Like its predecessor, It Came from the Nightosphere, this DVD has 16 episodes that jump from the first to fourth seasons. I’m pretty sure they managed to cram it all onto one disc this time, but this time around is special–it comes with your own Finn hat! Imagine walking through school wearing this new dig–y’know, if they allow hats. Imagine how many friends you’ll score–y’know, if they’re into Adventure Time. Now, there’s not much time before the DVD releases, as it’s coming out this week on October 2. But it’ll probably have the most sales a random-compilation DVD’s ever gotten–a majority of it likely being for that darn hat! Now, as always, let’s peer through the episodes that you’ll need to be expecting on the DVD list. (Some of the episodes are season-one titles that I’ve already talked about, so let’s rule those ones out right now: “The Jiggler”, “What is Life?”, “His Hero”, and “Ocean of Fear”. Now, on with the show!)

Titlecard S3E16 jakevsmemow.jpg

  • Jake vs. Me-Mow” (S3 E16) – As the titular episode of the DVD, it is likely the most exceptional, important, and unique one to date. Especially since the title card and character of Me-Mow herself was developed by a wee Adventure Timer named Gunnar Gilmore! The show’s creator, Pendleton “Pen” Ward, accepted the idea since it was “so cute and was drawn by a tiny kid.” Well, I bet with enough work my drawings will be the basis of an Adventure Time episode one day! :-x Anyway, the premise of the episode is that Jake is pigging out on one of Wildberry Princess’s pies, right? And all of a sudden, a tiny cat assassin named–obviously–Me-Mow appears in his pie. After introducing herself, the cat states that she is just a second-class assassin, and would get a full membership after the murder of a princess. So she hides in Jake’s nose, taking her poison syringe with her, and literally controls Jake into killing the Princess or getting killed himself…

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  • Susan Strong” (S2 E18) – While uprooting taffy-tree stumps, Finn and Jake come across a strange metal hatch in the ground. They follow its path to an underground garbage-infested cave, which is actually inhabited with the tribe of the “Hyoomans”. (Sound it out. :-?) Among these Hyoomans is one Hyooman that Finn and Jake focus solely on. As Finn had mentioned the sun coming down into the cave, she tells them “su-sun” when they ask for her name, which is interpreted as Susan. After seeing her inhuman strength, F & J ultimately name her Susan Strong. When they decide to bring Susan to the surface to teach them about the world surrounding them–like with any beginner–they get more than they bargained for, and eventually they have to stop Susan from getting to the Candy Kingdom to–you know. :(

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  • Belly of the Beast” (S2 E16) – When Finn and Jake’s Tree Fort gets all shook up, rudely awakening them from their slumbers, they find a firework-spewing beast outside the fort. After hearing cries from inside the beast, they decide to venture inside the behemoth’s body to rescue the victim–the victim actually being a bear who needs help putting up streamers. In fact, inside the monster’s stomach F & J find themselves inside an entire bear rave complete with flashing lights and fireworks, every partygoer seeming oblivious to the rave’s location. When they fail to get any attention with their statement, they decide to reconcile with the party’s patriarch–heh heh, its “party”-triarch–Party Pat (Andy Samberg), whom resides at the “blood waterbed” that is the beast’s heart. And besides, if Pat leaves, everyone follows. And not even a syrupy duet ballad from the two can save the bears from their possible fates. Let’s just say it involves a lot of lava… :lol:

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  • Video Makers” (S2 E23) – You may not know it, but Finn and Jake hold their own annual nightly Finn and Jake Movie Club at their tree fort. Tonight they’re showing old Mushroom War-era flicks (the War was what made Ooo look all post-apocalyptic-y), but one thing is restricting them–and if you guessed copyrighting, you were correct. Realizing that they’ve been committing criminal actions of illegally showing copyrighted movies, they decide to cancel for the night (despite Jake believing the pre-War copyright was powerless) and eventually find a video camera after the Club, and decide to show their own movies at the club. The next day, Finn, Jake, BMO, and Princess Bubblegum all work together to create a movie. But while Finn wants a tense action-adventure, Jake–surprisingly–wants a syrupy romcom. :neutral: And with every piece of footage Finn makes come criticism from Jake, and with every piece of footage Jake makes comes criticism from Finn, and so on. And left with the prestigious job of editor, BMO’s got his hands full over what to do–until he decides to quit the fight through the movie. (This episode will ultimately leave you saying “Check please”. Don’t ask why–unless you’re willing to put what you think that means in the comment section below.)

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  • Mortal Folly” (S2 E24) – After a session of meditating on the balcony, Finn and Jake are given special gems from Princess Bubblegum like the one in her tiara, set to protect them at where they were just about to go–the chamber of an evil sorcerer known as the Lich King, currently trapped in an amber prison. The gems’ protection purposes were that just staring at the Lich without this gem would possess you, similar to how anyone who dared to stare at Medusa turned to stone. Unfortunately, at this time the Waving Snail (you might have seen him in Easter eggs cameos in select episodes) crawls in, gets possessed, and slowly breaks the Lich’s amber prison and sets him free! Only left with the gems, the Gauntlet of Billy (Ooo’s greatest hero), and a pink sweater (for Finn as a token of affection, obviously), Finn and Jake must venture on what must be their most dangerous journey yet to prevent the Lich from regaining all his power. At the same time, they must break through an equally dangerous problem–the Ice King with his persistent pesters to receive a blessing to marry PB.

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  • Mortal Recoil” (S2 E25) – Now, I’m gonna have to spoil what happened at the end of “Mortal Folly” or else “Mortal Recoil” really won’t make much sense. Y’see, after the Lich’s defeat, the Ice King decided to pick up PB to “set her free”–but only clumsily and rather stupidly dropped her into the Lich’s Well of Power. The effect of the boiling well melted her body through–remember, she’s Princess Bubblegum–but, despite what the title card foreshadows, she did not die. She was rushed to the Candy Kingdom’s hospital, and (in a scene resembling your average super-cheesy medical drama) she was thankfully revived although she briefly flatlined. Tons of people came to see her recover, including Finn, Jake, and the Ice King. And Finn got a new pack courtesy of the princesses as a token for beating the Lich! Finn’s really put the Ice King on his blacklist now–this was clearly seen at the hospital–but he and Jake offer to nurse PB back to health. But they find some strange occurings in PB’s behavior, like crawling, heavy breathing, convulsions and other spasms. But as the day goes on, it is shown that the Well really left its mark on PB, turning her into an altered beast that Finn and Jake must fight to save Ooo and every single lifeform in it.

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  • Too Young” (S3 E5) – (This episode was nominated for a 2012 Primetime Emmy Award for Outstanding Short-Format Animated Program!) Now, I’ll have to spoil the finale of “Mortal Recoil” or else “Too Young” won’t make any sense. I know, total déjà vu, right? Or maybe extreme inception. Anyway, in “Recoil”‘s finale, PB was finally reassembled–but due to a shortage of pieces, she got a slight case of “Benjamin Button’s disease” and jumped back 5 years of age. This makes her ultimately thirteen–coincidentally, Finn’s age as well. Unfortunately, her age drop makes her too young to run the Candy Kingdom, so the Earl of Lemongrab takes her place. And he’s just as sour as he looks, his plots with the Kingdom and all. So PB and Finn are forced to cook up a plan to get Lemongrab out of here, even if it means making a decision that will change their lives forever. Ew, sounds like something I read off the back of a romance novel. :(

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  • Five Short Graybles” (S4 E2) – Now, this is probably the most unique Adventure Time episode yet. In fact, I’m not sure you could even call it an adventure at all. A strange man named Cuber shows you five short “Graybles” that are all connected in an initially unseen way that the viewer(s) must decipher. The Graybles are:
  • After hearing that Finn and Jake would be visiting the “grocery kingdom” for the hour, BMO decides to look in the mirror and share a conversation with his imaginary pal Football, impressing him with his “real boy” characteristics. (Wow, that makes me wonder if Pinocchio did this in his spare time. :D)
  • After wrapping up the first Grayble, Finn and Jake decide to celebrate by high-fiving. But it’s not enough. So throughout the second Grayble, Finn and Jake keep upping the amps with the caliber of their high-fives, until they come out with the “super ultimate high-five“.
  • PB attempts to craft the “perfect sandwich” for Cinnamon Bun using: cheese from a centrifuge-spun cow, lettuce from a chemically/perfectly shrunk head of lettuce, tomato from a jellyfish-balloon hybrid in a transportation machine, and bread from an incantation. She eventually deems the sandwich “the most ultimate sandwich that ever existed and ever will exist.”
  • Ice King decides to send Gunter away due to his “nasty booty” stinking up his ice fortress, but he eventually finds that it’s not Gunter that stinks–it’s him. So, after a shower accompanied with penguin pit-scrubbing, he apologizes to a soaked Gunter but finds the answer to why his pits so abruptly stank…
  • Lumpy Space Princess is sure that her rendition of “These Lumps” would dominate the Candy Kingdom Talent Show. But when the act before her plays the exact same song (and rather well, at that) she is roped into an awkward and sticky situation. But when she discovers an unexpected and unseen talent, she catches the win from MC Peppermint Butler–well, until Finn and Jake finish their “super ultimate high five”.

Titlecard S3E17 thankyou.jpg

  • Thank You” (S3 E17) – (This episode was nominated for a 2012 Annie Award for Best Animated Special Production!) They celebrated Christmas with “Holly Jolly Secrets”, they celebrated Halloween with titles like “From Bad to Worse”, now they actually celebrated last year’s Thanksgiving! And they celebrated it with a truly heartwarming and unique premise: the Snow Golem makes his third and most crucial appearance in this episode (after the original short and “Prisoners of Love”, respectively) as he decides to make his tranquil life a bit more exciting by taking a lost Fire Wolf pup under his wing. The message of the episode is that, no matter how much snow melts you get, even the most differentiated pair can share a strong friendship. Meanwhile, Finn and Jake are fruitlessly attempting to break through the Ice King’s armor layers to get back for having their sandwiches stolen. In the name of all that’s on TV, why do these two get so worked up over small things like sandwich theft?!

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  • Goliad” (S4 E10) – Eternal life is, obviously, impossible to achieve for any normal human. But it is possible as long as you’re someone like God, Jesus, or Skips. And it’s even gotten to PB’s head what the Candy Kingdom would do when she was gone–especially after her brush with death in “Mortal Folly”. So she creates her successor and heir to her throne, which she shows to Finn and Jake. This heir is Goliad, a Candy Sphinx with a mound on her forehead and the voice of a cute little British child. After realizing that PB’s been up for more than 3 days in a row constructing and teaching Goliad without a wink of sleep, Finn and Jake decide to monitor Goliad. They take her down to a preschool where they build an obstacle course–f-for the kids, not Goliad. But when Jake is forced to yell at the kids to stop them from assaulting him, Goliad decides to imitate his harsh ways in the thought of leadership. When Finn tries to convince Goliad to use her mind before her mouth, she reveals the mound on her forehead to be a third eye, which she begins to use for psychically darker purposes…twisted

Titlecard S3E25 dadsdungeon.jpg

Dad’s Dungeon” (S3 E25) –  This feels like nothing but a sequel or follow-up or counterpart or something to “Dungeon” back from season one. Anyway, in the episode Finn and Jake’s dad Joshua (really shoulda watched “Boom Boom Mountain” now, huh?) has them navigate through a fight-filled dungeon meant to toughen Finn–with timely updates from Joshua via Holo-Message Player. Unfortunately, Joshua leaves Jake with his hands tied when he is directed and forced to try and hold back Finn in the dungeon. Although I’m happy their dad’s back, I never thought of him as the antagonist! :-?

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  • The Silent King” (S2 E14) – After Finn and Jake get rid of the spank-happy tyrant of a goblin king, Xergiok, they are taken to the Goblin Kingdom’s palace where they meet the royal goblin chief-of-staff, Gummy. Gummy begs Finn to be the new goblin king, and also tells off that they are ill-accustomed to any act of compassion, since Xergiok spanked their butts so often he could’ve ran away to Sir Mix-a-Lot and made a remix on “Baby Got Back”! Finn initially rejects the offer, but seeing the goblin community would eventually form a riot and then be destroyed without a king, he decides to take the offer with Jake as his “goblin queen”. Gummy shows F & J around the things they are royally entitled to, like a birthing chamber and an advanced gaming system (:D), and also suggests they read the Book of Royal Rules, which they easily don’t. But the next morning, it’s shown that the goblin kingdom rules restrict even the kings to do pretty much anything: brushing their teeth, cutting or chewing their own food, they can’t even help someone who’s being robbed. But Finn wants to show that an active king is a proper king, especially when Xergiok has decided to return…

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So this is all you need to know about the DVD future of Adventure Time. They start hitting stores tomorrow, so save your dollars now and be one of the first to show off their fancy Finn hat! Remember, that’s 16 episodes on one disc for a favorably low price. Pretty soon, I might be telling you about Reg Show‘s DVD future–but who knows if they even have any DVDs planned yet? Well, I’m gonna leave you with that question to ponder upon, and make sure to tune in next time for more awesomeness courtesy of Sammwak! (Remember, I really don’t know when I’m releasing these days [ugh, school], so make sure you have an active email subscription. If not, start today!)

Stay classy America,

~S~ 8-)

Video of the Week: If any of you ever saw WCG Ultimate Gamer, you may have seen a contestant named Adande–or as his gamertag dubbed him, “Swoozie”. Well, although it’s been a while since WCG, he’s still got a strong YouTube channel today with nearly half a million subscribers and over 60 million video views! But 1/6 of that fame came from one series. An animated coming-of-age comedy series that, altogether, racked up 10 million hits! And 2/5 of that came from this one video. The start of the series. It is Swoozie’s history of–cheating in middle school. But you’ll find that it’s incredibly hilarious cuz it’s true, so go check out some more of Swoozie’s stuff at  (subscribe if possible), but for now shove this in your face.

Not satisfied with your main entree? Try some sides ;):

p.s. I got the idea to put this up—N-n-no, I saw this to begin with thanks to my good friend Henry. Y’see, he’s followed my footsteps (who wouldn’t? :roll:) and started his own blog! Check his awesomeness out @ http://henryyesme.wordpress.com/

Epic Mickey and friend(s) are back in not one, but two epic sequels!


And let that be known. I already told you all about the news, and what I found next was even more than I had blogged about. A surprise beyond surprises. A surprise good enough to land the cover story of the latest Nintendo Power! Lemme recap from my previous post about the news: “Back in the years of the twentieth century, there was a craze that I’d like to call the “animation invasion” or the “cartoon boom”. This was a time where cartoons literally came into our world and ran wild, changing rules and righting wrongs. This era still echoes in our minds today, but there are some mass-media businesses that brought us the echo, most of them being stuff like Nickelodeon or Disney. Nickelodeon jumped into action in about the early to late 90s, and perhaps the early 2000s as well, introducing timeless classics like DougRocko’s Modern LifeCatDog, and, of course, SpongeBob (most likely the only creation during the cartoon boom that still runs today). But don’t forget about Disney and all they’ve done with bringing memorable characters to our time. Especially Mickey Mouse, and this brings up a new point. If you were a Wii owner headed in the right direction as of ’10, you might have picked up the M. Mouse game Epic Mickey. And, like usual, it triggered a swarm of rumors about a possible sequel. Well, everything you’ve heard is true.”

I already informed you about information like Epic Mickey officially receiving a sequel, and the tons of debuts the new sequel was gonna have: Oswald making his playable debut, the series making its debut on console and computer alike, the new modes in the game, its plot and list of tentative titles, and even its possible date: holiday 2012. Well, you’re about to add more to what you already know, because Epic Mickey and company are coming back later this year, but not in just one sequel, but two! The NP cover story issue isn’t hitting the markets until tomorrow, so be lucky I’ve got this exclusive info for you. The two sequels will be The Power of Two for the Wii, and The Power of Illusion for the 3DS. Get your paint and thinner ready, folks—you’re getting more opportunity than you even bargained for.

Although I showed you four possible covers for the game that were competing for the ultimate and official title, they basically all lost to another cover that I honestly believe doesn’t parallel as much, but is still kinda cool.

But, hey—what the creators must announce is what the fans must anticipate. Anyway, let’s talk a bit about The Power of Two, the more-known-about sequel of the two, the one that actually has a Wikipedia article. The platform range for this game have branched out tremendously, abandoning the concept of being just a Wii-exclusive title. It is now available for the Mac OS X, the PC, and the three rivals of the seventh generation of gaming: the PS3, Wii, and X360. Now that’s a severe case of irony. The excitement first kindled thanks to Destructoid when they put up an article last summer speculating the sequel and its possible covers. The rumors inched closer to reality when the French division of Disney as well as game designer Warren Spector invited the French to an “epic project”  comencing in late March 2012. The rumors came even closer when Nintendo Power announced, at the end of their March ’12 issue, that their next issue in April would have a “top-secret” preview, and this is what that would look like if you actually read the last page:

Can you tell what those things at the bottom are?…

GameTrailers also stated that their March 22, 2012 episode would involve a “world-exclusive preview of Warren Spector’s new epic adventure”, and it would be “notably significant.” Tons of clues and mind-boggles later, Warren finally confirmed that the rumors were true on the 21st, and that the title of the game would be Power of Two, and would feature new parts of the city as well as old ones ruined by earthquakes and other natural disasters. But luckily, for us, I confirmed this information even earlier. Not to be a showoff. Warren said that over 700 people would be part of the sequel’s crew, and that over a thousand alters were made to the camera issues that were criticized in the first game. Now, about the plot.

Taking place some time after the original title, the Mad Doctor (whom Mickey had defeated in the original), mysteriously returns to the Wasteland, despite being presumably blown up in the original game. [This reminds me about a metaphor you could always use in these peculiar situations: when Kenny dies in South Park, he almost always comes back for the next episode he appears in.] Claiming to have realized the error of his ways, ironically enough, he offers to work alongside Oswald and other Wasteland residents to mend the damage caused by earthquakes in order to make a few amends.

Giving him the benefit of the doubt, Oswald accepts the Mad Doctor’s helpful plan for the city. However, not long after this, the Wasteland suffers even more wear-and-tear than before, and suspicion rises that the Mad Doctor is not keeping to his own truth. Gus the Gremlin, Oswald’s buddy advisor, and his girlfriend Ortensia (confirming that rabbits can actually have love lives), all come to a conclusion: “When there’s something strange in the neighborhood, who we gonna call? MICKEY MOUSE!” And apparently this is the best possible plan since Mickey had saved Wasteland in 2010. Mickey climbs through the same mirror that he did in 2010, retrieves his magical paint-and-thinner brush from Yen Sid’s workshop, after having it taken away at the end of–gee, this game has a lot of tie-ins to its predecessor, doesn’t it? With the help of Gus, Mickey returns to the corrupted Wasteland to uncover the truth behind the Mad Doctor’s “little white lie”, with Oswald as a sidekick along the way.

And indeed, they discover that the Mad Doctor had tricked them, using his helpful offer as an excuse to create and release his new works known as “Blotworx” into the already troubled districts, hybrids of the original game’s Blotlings and Beetleworx. Realizing his mistake that could cost him the life of the city, Oswald becomes Mickey’s assist in taking down the Mad Doctor once again to fix a mess he himself had started.

………………………………….

For Wii users, your game will be developed by Junction Point Studios, but for PS3 and X360 users, yours will be from Blitz Games. For everyone, it will be published by Disney and distributed by Buena Vista, running under the Gamebryo engine, used by companies like 2K Games, Ubisoft, and Sony. Instead of coming out in the holidays of the year, it will instead come around the fall season in September. Waiting 5 months isn’t all that bad, is it? If you can’t wait, you can always hitch up the Nintendo Power April issue and get your fix before the primetime release.

Yep, this is the final cover art. Not some fake that I made to be show-y…POST APRIL FOOLS! You totally fell for that, didn’t you? Yeah, this is just a fake I made, but at least it looks cool. And, Disney, if you’re coming up with a cover for Power of Illusion, you could always use mine under my 100% permission, but only with 5% of the game’s financial revenues. Anyway, Power of Illusion will be an apparent 3DS-exclusive Epic Mickey sequel, and it will probably be the second of the two sequels, as its date is not yet determined. So, the game is basically a sequel’s sequel. This time, a company named Dreamrift will be grabbing the reins of development, and Peter Ong will be designing, but Disney and Buena Vista still have their jobs. It is not yet known what engine it will run on, but it has been spreading that the sequel will possibly be running under hand-drawn sprites and scrolling backgrounds, which Spector has confirmed as true.

The plot for this game is completely irrelevant with that of The Power of Two, but still takes place after the original game. In this, the evil witch Mizrable (good name), and her Castle of Illusion, have accidentally been transported to the Wasteland thanks to the wizard Yen Sid, the same guy with the workshop Mickey got his brush back from in Power of Two. Oswald tells Mickey the news, but also adds that Minnie Mouse has been detected inside. So now, for his second sequel, the two are on a mission to save not only Minnie, but the “Illusions” of other trapped Disney characters inside the castle.

The 3DS mechanics of the game basically resemble the game Scribblenauts; where you must write out words to convert them into real objects. In this game, you must trace out those objects to bring them to existence. And for people who aren’t the best illustrators, that’s a bad thing, since the quality of your drawings reflect on the quality of the drawn object. Nintendo Power used a cannon as an example. A well-traced cannon will only inflict harm on enemies, but a badly traced cannon can inflict harm on everyone else, even Mickey! Each stage of the game will resemble a different Disney animated feature. Some announced ones include Peter PanSleeping Beauty, and even Tangled.

………………………………

So are you excited for these sequels? I know I’ll be checking the ratings in September this year to see if I should pick it up! Anyway, I’ll give you one last thing to participate in before you leave. Mwak out.

- Sam

p.s. Time for our Would You Rather o’ the Week! Would you rather…every time you go #1 in the bathroom, it lights on fire, or every time you go #2, it blows up?

Pride, Prejudice, and Plumbing: The Story of Mario (Part I)


Hey guys it’s Sam, and we all know that when you usually can’t find out about some source, you dive into your local library, in school or not, or try to trust online sources. And as we all know, you can’t trust anyone from the mouth, so should you be able to trust someone from the keyboard? Either way, you’re definitely gonna learn something today, because I’m gonna be teaching you about one of gaming’s biggest icons and mascots. Here are a couple hints: he’s short, pudgy, has a bushy mustache, wears a red cap, and has blue overalls. Does it ring a bell? He’s one of Nintendo’s most famed, familiar, and simply best characters ever created under Shigeru Miyamoto’s name. He is Mario, one of the coolest, sweetest plumbers I’ve seen…well, the only plumber I’ve seen.

Our beloved Red Rivet (c’mon, the Blue Blur was a sweet-enough nickname for Sonic) actually did not debut in the classic Super Mario Bros in ’85, nor was it Mario Bros in ’83, but it was actually Donkey Kong in ’81. In that platformer-pioneering game, Mario was originally known as Jumpman, and he was originally intended to make his way up to his kidnapped girlfriend and defeat his own pet ape that turned against him after mistreatment. In this game, Mario was only a carpenter, and his profession was altered in Mario Bros to the plumber he is today. Mario was given such bright clothing, like his overalls, to make sure his actions were visualized. His red cap came in because the limited mid-80s video game programming animation made it difficult for enabling Mario’s hair to wave when he jumped. Mario jumped into the platformer kind of game after originally being set to escape a maze lacking the ability to jump. Miyamoto, the man that created Mario in the first place, gave him a new genre tone because “if you had a barrel rolling towards you, what would you do?”

Miyamoto conceived Mario in the first place while developing Donkey Kong (no big surprise there), trying to think of a title that could sum up for all of Nintendo’s past coin-op failures, such as the game Sheriff. What is Sheriff? Well, exactly. Mario’s full name has not been fully announced by Nintendo, although it is not “Mario Mario”, despite the inference of the Mario Bros. series title, its use in the ’93 movie, and info from the Prima guidebook for Superstar Saga.

Title says all. The games in their chronological orders are: MARIO BROS. (1981), SUPER MARIO BROS. (1985), SUPER MARIO BROS. 2 (1987), SUPER MARIO BROS. 3 (1990), SUPER MARIO WORLD (1991), SUPER MARIO 64 (1996), SUPER MARIO SUNSHINE (2002), SUPER SMASH BROS. BRAWL (2008).

Mario originally intended to be named “Mr. Video”, and was also planned to appear in every Nintendo game that hit the markets. But the idea of the name “Mr. Video” was scrapped because Miyamoto believed that this name would make our hero “[disappear] off the face of the Earth.” And it was one regular day in 1981 for Nintendo, and they were hosting a meeting trying to conceive a name in time for a game’s release. Suddenly, their landlord burst in, angrily demanding and confronting that they pay for a long-overdue rent they had gotten far behind in. That landlord’s name was Segali…Mario Segali. And it was after this being that our precious plumber got his name, as long as Segali received his share of cash. Believe me, mister…your name did more than just christen a plumber.

Mario has since appeared in several kinds of games, including racing (Mario Kart series), puzzle, party (Mario Party series), role-playing (Super Mario RPG: Legend of the Seven Stars), fighting (Super Smash Bros. series), and sports (Mario Tennis, Mario Golf, Mario Super Sluggers, Super Mario Strikers, etc.).

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Here is some stuff I bet you didn’t even know about Mario. When you find out about this, you’ll be totally fascinated. I should know. I’m the person that’s giving it to you!

  • The notorious antagonist of the Mario saga, Bowser, was originally sketched out as an ox by Miyamoto, but accidental interpretation by a fellow animator turned him into a turtle after the two worked on it. And honestly, I think being a turtle fits Bowser way better, compared to the species of usual Mario enemies.
  • Recurring character Birdo, supposedly Yoshi’s love interest, is somewhat officially a dude, as stated in the Mario 2 instruction booklet.
  • The name of “Wario”, the malevolent yin to Mario’s gallant yang, was derived from the Japanese word “warui”, meaning “bad”. Both were either way voiced by Charles Martinet, who has been giving Mario the spice to his voice for 17 years now. The same thing most likely applies to Luigi’s yin Waluigi.
  • Koji Kondo, the rightful composer and sound arranger/advisor of 13 Mario titles, has had music that is known worldwide, especially the Super Mario Bros theme and its countless fan-made renditions. Heck, there was even a Mariorock opera back in ’03! Other titles he has composed for or done work for include the original Legend of Zelda among other LoZ titles, the original PilotwingsStar Fox and its N64 reboot, and the original NES Golf and Soccer.
  • Super Mario Bros. obviously enough used to hold the title of the most bestselling game in history with 40.24 million units, until it was degraded to 2nd place in 2006 by the Wii’s launch title Wii Sports. Nintendo making the two most bestselling games created? It’s like James Cameron directing the two highest-grossing movies created.
  • In 1999, Mario Golf hit the markets 3 years after Super Mario 64 pretty much made gaming history. Believe it or not, this was not the first golfing game starring Mario. There was a character resembling Mario in the original NES Golf, but he surely made an official appearance later in NES Open Tournament Golf, as well as Luigi, and Princesses Peach and Daisy.
  • Princess Peach has appeared in more games than any other female game character in gaming history, even people you’d suppose, like Samus Aran or Chun-Li. She was also originally known as Princess Toadstool ever since her debut in ’85, and, in the west (aka us), she held that name for 8 years until it was changed permanently in Yoshi’s Safari.

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So THIS is the currency system in Mushroom Kingdom. Hey, could you hook me up with, like, 30 of those?

‘Twas pretty fascinating, huh? Oh, back to our learning.

Mario also had a career outside of his namesake series. That’s right, folks, Mario also had a non-Mario life. Surprisingly enough, he serves as the referee of Mike Tyson’s Punch-Out!, and he is also playable in NBA Street V3 and SSX: On Tour, both by EA. He also makes cameos in both A Link to the Past and Ocarina of Time as a portrait, and in Metal Gear Solid: The Twin Snakes, he appears as a minuscule statue. So all the peeps that own some or all of these games, ya better start keeping an eye out if you haven’t been already! According to kids, Mario is a more known icon than even Mickey Mouse, and that dude’s hard to beat. Mario has appeared in over 200 games since his debut, but it would probably take up a lot of space counting them all. See why this is only part one? And speaking of part one, looks like this is the end of part one!

But don’t worry! If you like, rate, comment, and jump on dat subscribe button’s head regularly, part two will come sooner than you think. Trust me, behind the dashboard, it’s almost always rush hour. Anyway, thanks for watching our show! Now, if you’ll excuse me, I got some 64-bit racing to get to. Now, if only I could stop slipping on that banana!…

- Sam

Question o’ The Day: If you could come up with and interpret any idea for a Mario power-up concept, what new power-up would you conceive?

p.s. Bro, Mario is literally my research paper topic! No, literally, he is, and I got a load of online sources to prove it. That stuff is so thick, I could literally write a novel with all that info! But of course, that’s some sort of copyright violation, isn’t it? I hope I used the right sources, and I also don’t think there’s much informational books about Mario out now, is there? But honestly, isn’t Mario such a good topic? I could’ve chosen Link or Samus or Fox McCloud, but I specifically chose Mario, and that’s all that matters…

(p.p.s. If you subscribe, I’ll stop talking so much!)

The News n’ Release Dates of the Pilkey Books WE’VE BEEN WAITING FOR


Hey guys it’s Sam, and you might remember the time when I complained about there being no Captain Underpants 9 yet back on my other site, 2Sam2Mwak. Well, Wikipedia hooked me up with the release dates I needed, and those are the release dates that I’ll be sharing with you! It’s like a game of phone tag, isn’t it?!?! Except, there are no phones…or tags, I guess. If you read my post (if you haven’t click on the colored lettering above) about it you’d know Dav Pilkey’s top excuse for the delays, but let’s just slice through the cheese and get what we need. And plus I’ll throw in some Pilkey videos to certify you aren’t just reading passage after passage, because that’s all boring and stuff!

This cover art seems strangely promising, but my mind's telling me it's fake.

If you’ve read Captain Underpants 8, you’d know how the book would end: a coming-soon ad for Captain Underpants 9, also known as the Terrifying Re-Turn of Tippy Tinkletrousers, confirming Professor Poopypants to be the first villain in Captain Underpants history to be a main villain for two books. That ad was back when the book published in 2006, and a confirmed 6 years later is when the book will release…this year. In the final days of August 2012, the ninth epic novel we’ve been itching for is finally coming out. August will also be the month of the scheduled release of the eighth and final promotion for F.A.R.T.S. before its official publishing in the fall, “Fartistic: The Art of F.A.R.T.S.” Pass the spray, please! Dav hasn’t cracked much open about it, but we’ll naturally learn more as the year progresses, won’t we? And to make things even better, by the very end of the first month of the next year (Jan 2013), a tenth waistband-warrior novel is scheduled to release! Captain Underpants, among being able to leap buildings wedgie-free and being faster than a speeding waistband, is known for being more powerful than boxer shorts. But will his next foe provide his met match in the Revolting Revenge of the Radioactive Robo-Boxers? That’s for you to find out, and me to squeeze the juice out of, hopefully. But are these boxers boxer shorts, or actual boxers, like pugilists, the people you see in the ring knocking the wind out of one another?

At the end of the eighth book, there was also a “coming soon-ish” ad for other books, and one of them was Captain Underpants Cartoon-O-Rama #1: Heroes, Villains, and Super Creeps, a how-to-draw book starring your favorite friends of Jerome Horwitz Elementary, with the exaggerated promise of 78 billion cartoons to learn in 22 1/2 easy lessons. I’ll say this in the easiest and nicest way possible: yeah, right. The release date of this is TBA (that’s a fancy term for when we don’t know the date yet, alas “to be announced”), but it still sounds somewhat promising.

What happens when you give products twists of your own without butchering them? You get stuff like, I dunno, parodies. And Dav Pilkey himself once conceived one of those in a parody compilation that never made it to market because of his girlfriend believing it would be too offensive (Try saying that to the Topps Company’s face.), and it was at that time in the mid-90′s when Dav scrapped the idea and began working on the first Captain Underpants book instead. These unreleased parodies included Where the Mild Things AreThe Babysitters ClubbedSmellalunaFurious GeorgeThe Tragic Schoolbus, and SarahPlain and Portly. But now in the early 2010′s, Dav’s at it again with FrankenFart vs. the Bionic Barf Bunnies of Diarrhea Land, a “confirmed” book that we barely know about. Written by Dav’s “evil doppelganger” Evil Dav, the book, according to the cover art (all we saw of it) in its ad, the book will contain “high-brow”, “sophisticated humor”, and “relevant social commentary.” Gosh, I never knew Evil Dav was such a proficient speller. FrankenFart also made a cameo as an “easy-to-read book” in Captain Underpants 8 itself, being read by the exceptionally dumb Melvin Sneedly—wait, here’s the kicker—in the parallel universe. We  know an exceptionally little amount about this book, but the details of the book inside and out are TBD (that’s a fancy term for to be determined), but that seems like an exceptionally good book compared to the exceptional amount of times I use the word “exceptionally.”

If you know your proper kung-fu-caveman graphic novel adventures, you’re likely to have heard of Ook Schadowski and Gluk Jones. If you read their first adventure, Kung-Fu Cavemen from the Future (which I personally own via Christmas gift), you’d learn about how they stopped the effect of the combination of two generations of the Goppernopper family from destroying the natures of Ook and Gluk’s surroundings, and now via “coming soon-ish ad” the announcement of Ook and Gluk’s next adventure, The Adventures of Ook and Gluk Jr.: Kung-Fu Cavekids in Outer Space, commenced and is currently, like Captain Underpants Cartoon-O-Rama, with a release date that is TBA, as well as the main crafting of it, let alone its premise.

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So there you have it—all the release dates of the Pilkey books we’ve been waiting for. Comment, rate, and give that ole subscribe button a good wedgie! And check back next Monday, Tuesday, or any other day of next week for a new dose of awesomeness. For now, this is Sammwak, giving a reason of why I want a Facebook. Here’s my plan: I’ll name myself “Nobody”, and when I like someone’s post, it’ll say Nobody Likes This! Wasn’t that a kneeslapper?

- Sam

p.s. More Pilkey fever? Well, my friend, infect away with these cool FUN FACTS!!!

  • Did you know that Dav Pilkey’s picture book The Paperboy won the 1997 Caldecott Honor award? See, Pilkey’s an award-winning author. Other awards he’s earned is The National Written and Illustrated By… Awards Contest for Students in ’86, winning the 14-19 age group with his first-ever book, World War Won. His book Dog Breath (1994) also won the 1998 California Young Reader Medal.
  • Dav was caught in a magnitude 6.8 earthquake in the Pac. Northwest, rocking his house for 30 seconds while painting the illustrations for the first Super Diaper Baby. Various possessions of his broke, but luckily none of them were his paints. Now that’s what I call nothing more or less than a miracle.
  • The main villain of the fourth waistband warrior novel, Professor Pippy P. Poopypants, was designed after Albert Einstein, and few people know this, but Einstein’s middle name was actually Pippy.
  • Super Diaper Baby 2 was partially somewhat designed after Dav’s old childhood comic saga, Water Man. If you’ve read the book (*spoiler alert*), you’d know how Rip van Tinkle slides into the bank and slides each bill under the door, and this was exactly how Water Man’s evil twin Mazumba used to sneak into and rob banks. You know how Rip van Tinkle can evaporate into a cloud and rain pee drops that find their ways into chimneys? This was how Water Man’s evaporation worked, but all the drops would go into one chimney and reform themselves into Water Man again.
  • The Ricky Ricotta’s Mighty Robot series by Dav Pilkey (as well as illustrator Martin Ontiveros) was originally Ricky Ricotta’s Giant Robot, but this was varied when young fans realized that the Robot isn’t “Giant”; he’s just 12 times taller than a mouse, which would make him only about 2 1/2 feet tall, but if you still have a Giant Robot copy, hang on to it, since no more copies of that kind are published and it might be valuable one day!

Game n Vote: Righteous Quest 2/Jumping Finn


Hey guys it’s Sam, and remember the last time we had a Game n Vote session? I know…early 2011, right? Or was it 2010? Well, I’ve decided to revive our beloved segment to kick off the New Year, and if one can do that, they must be very honored. Well, today I’m reviewing another Adventure Time game that’s as frustrating as it is fun. Ladies, gentlemen, and magical dogs, I give you Righteous Quest 2.

Sadly, there's little skill to be found in this game, Finn.

Righteous Quest 2 is the same Adventure Time-themed 2D platformer that Righteous Quest was, but definitely less fun. This game takes place over five (not including the unlockable Lumpy Space level) destinations: the Candy Kingdom, where you fend off Candy Zombies, the Obstacle Course, where you make your way through traps and Battle Cubes, the Ice Kingdom, where you make your way through snow monsters and slippery land, the Ninja Passage, where you make your way through Marceline-sent ninjas, and finally the ultimate boss battle level, starring Marceline herself.

Thankfully enough, this game is a bit more harder than the first Quest, making it at least a bit more fun. The Ninjas come back and now take several hits to defeat, the Ice Kingdom’s snow monsters take 2 hits to destroy, etc. The bad thing about this game is that it takes its responsibilities way too far and turns the game into an impossible 2D version of Sonic Unleashed, literally. The final boss battle is simply the hardest aspect. Marceline’s health goes down unbelievably slow, bit by bit, and it won’t even help if you unleash your full Wizard Powers on her. The game is confusing, head-hurting, and nonetheless a waste of time, no matter how high you can get your score, but I bet you struggle on the boss battle, too!

THE GOOD

“A bit” harder than last time

Very nostalgic music

Wizard Powers are normally very useful.

THE BAD

Difficulty is horribly punishing

Boss battle is merely impossible

Finn’s complaints when left idle are annoying

The game has a clear lack of substance

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Game-play: B- (3 pts)

Play-Again Ratio: C (2 pts)

Style: B+ (3 pts)

Fun: C- (1.5 pts)

Smarts: C (2 pts)

Entertainment: C- (1.5 pts)

FINAL SCORE: 13 out of 30 (sweet muffins!), 2 stars out of 5, 44% out of 100%

CONSENSUS: What’s boring, mind-numbing, impossible, and all together a waste of time? Sadly enough, Righteous Quest 2, that’s what.

Well, if you don’t believe me, you could always try playing Righteous Quest 2 here. Not-so-happy journeying!

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Well, you’re back. I predict that you rage quit. You rage quit, didn’t you? Yeah, you did. Anyway, let’s use our gracious poll to see what you think about the game!

Well, goodbye for now from Sammwak…just kidding! It’s the new year, and I gotta start it with something we’ve never seen before…a Game n Vote double feature! That’s right, not one, but two Finn and Jake games are getting reviewed, and I’m finishing up my sealed deal with an actually fun adventure: Jumping Finn.

Talk about major buttkicking!

Jumping Finn may look like just an ordinary Adventure Time game with not a lot of hope going for it. Actually, despite its lack of badges, it’s the best Adventure Time game I’ve played since…probably the Sound Castle games. It just debuted in the final month of summer 2011 at cartoonnetworkla.com before it finally hit primetime. The game is actually about trying to rescue Princess Bubblegum from the Ice King like usual, and the method of this game is to kick Finn’s butt (literally) and make him go flying. You can even set the power of Jake’s kick, Let’s Golf-style. At the end of your run, you receive “money” that sums up and is usable to buy power-ups and boosts, like fans, rainbows, and even Marceline and Lady Rainicorn themselves. The game ends when you rescue the princess after flying through the Ice King’s castle. The power-ups are:

  • Upgrade Kick (increasing the amount of kicks Jake can use on Finn in the air)
  • Upgrade Bounce (increasing the amount of bounces Jake can use on Finn when he leaves the sky)
  • Fan (Helps Finn stay airborne)
  • Rainbow w/ Cloud (Finn gets launched upon contact)
  • Marceline (Finn gets launched after being hit by her Axe bass)
  • Birds (Finn gets carried by them)
  • Lady Rainicorn (Finn can ride her up, but it requires clicking and holding)
  • Meteor (Finn can ride it fast and far)

This game is an absolute prime success in its only job: satisfying anyone who plays it. This game is definitely a fun, engaging, and somewhat hilarious entry into Adventure Time‘s countless list of games and their sequels. Heck, the game even allows you to continue your previous game! It saves your progress! No other Finn & Jake game can do that! None! Definitely a good way to kill time in a satisfyingly entertaining way. If you don’t believe me, check out this red-hot rating!

THE GOOD

Very fun and entertaining

Kills time very quickly

Upgrades and power-ups are definitely worth the big air

Reasonable storyline

Great charm.

THE BAD

Lack of badges removes hopes and striving.

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Game-play: A+ (5 pts)

Entertainment: A+ (5 pts)

Fun: A+ (5 pts)

Play-Again Ratio: A+ (5 pts)

Style: A (4 pts)

Smarts: A (4 pts)

FINAL SCORE: 28 out of 30 (sweet muffins…again!!), 6 stars out of 5, 92% out of 100%

CONSENSUS: It may have a lack of badges, but Jumping Finn‘s charm, humor, entertainment, and time-killing strategies definitely move the loss of badges over players’ heads and make it one of the best Finn & Jake adventures yet.

Click here. Come on. Hello? Why aren’t you clicking? COME ON!!

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I’m not even gonna say a word. Just vote.

Well, goodbye from Sammwak, for real this time. :( But don’t be sad! Come back on the 9th for another red-hot Sammwak post! Make sure to subscribe, like (bloggers only), comment, and rate!

Your friend,

Samuel M. – promoting the cure to boredom since 2010

Nintendo Power: The Score, More Games, and Other Stuff


Hey guys it’s Sam, and I’ve just recently got my hands on another juicy Nintendo Power issue for more buzz from there to here! It talked about upcoming excitements such as the 25th Sonic anniversary reunion with modern and classic, Sonic Generations, the third Olympian battle between speed and style, Mario & Sonic at the London 2012 Olympic Games, and an old 3DS revisit to a classic in-your-face ninja adventure, Shinobi.

Sadly, that’s not what I’m entirely talking about (which doesn’t mean I’m spilling no beans at all). There’s always one page in every NP issue in the “Pulse” section that looks at the fans instead of the games. This page is called “The Score”: what Nintendo fans think, want, and do. Racked with percentages or opinions from fans, this page has some pretty surprising juice on it. Check out this page from last month’s issue:

If you’re not a fan of tiny print, I’ll break it down to you. Did you know that:

  • 40% of people first played Ocarina of Time on the N64?
  • The most people selected gray as their primary N64 controller color?
  • 48% of fans played the original Super Smash Bros. for over 2 days?
  • 32% more of you like Polygonal Mario over Paper Mario?
  • 44% of you know the DK Rap?
  • According to a pie chart, people think the best N64 wrestling game is WWF Wrestlemania 2000?
  • 14% more of you think that repeating days in LoZ (Legend of Zelda): Majora’s Mask was pure genius?
  • 2% more of you (against Super Mario 64‘s percentage and GoldenEye 007‘s percentage combined) think that the original Ocarina of Time made the most lasting impact?

See, I told you it was fascinating. Here are a couple of fan-determined facts from my Score…

  • The best way to fly is by raccoon tail (Super Mario Bros. 3) according to 46% of you.
  • When asked which 3DS virtual console game library was the most anticipated, fans decided that the Game Boy Color‘s library was the most anticipating.
  • 89% more people would be a Koopa, for a Bowser lackey, instead of a Goomba.
  • 58% of gamers hoard RPG items instead of using them frequently.
  • People believe that they could go either way when questioned if Pilotwings‘ Wuhu Island should return in future games.
  • Speaking of Pilotwings, people say the best in-game vehicle is the plane. Duh.
  • A surprisingly tough 53% of you play horror games with the lights off
  • 36% more people think that the power glove Link acquires in A Link To The Past is better than the NES peripheral’s.

And now the beans that you’ve all been wanting me to spill….new upcoming games more exciting than you can shake a tail feather at!

Mario, my dear plumbing friend, I'm not a toiletologist, but I recommend you don't step in that.

Link had his time to shine in 3D this year with Ocarina of Time 3D, so what about Mario? Don’t worry. He has a great new 3DS adventure of his own, now officially entitled Super Mario 3D Land. Flying into stores November 13, this game mixes itself into classic 2D side-scrolling Mario games, and modern free-roam 3D Mario games. Wikipedia describes: “The game offers a number of traditional Mario items, such as the Super Mushroom, Fire Flower, and Starman, along with new power-ups that bestow a special suit onto Mario that grants him new abilities. Some revealed power-ups include the Super Leaf from Super Mario Bros. 3 which allows him to turn into Tanooki Mario and attack with his raccoon-like tail and float in the air, and the Propeller Box, which acts similarly to the Propeller Block and the Propeller Mushroom from New Super Mario Bros. Wii, allowing Mario to reach high places.” Does it sound juicy enough? This game features a 3DS autostereoscopic technology that bestows players with depth gazing at the screen. Although it’s a band fit for one man, look forward to this game as something to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.

Straining yourself choosing between green eyes or potbellies? Traditional platforming or unbridled speed? Well, with the 25th anniversary of Sega’s fast-n’-famous hedgehog, you don’t have to choose. We’re going back in time while still staying in the future with Sonic Generations, where modern and classic speeds of sound reunite. Sonic and company get sucked into a “time hole” during their 25th anniversary celebration, scattering everyone across time. As Sonic begins searching for his pals, he stumbles upon his old 1991 self that made the Genesis so popular, Classic Sonic. The two race through history to find their friends and mend the time stream. But this isn’t just a 3DS-exclusive..it’s also heading for the Xbox 360, PS3, and even the PC. Are you feeling a need for speed across 3 eras in 20 years of adventure (Classic, Dreamcast, and Modern)? Do you want to see your idolized hedgehog skateboard? Do you want to get your money’s worth after 6 months of announcement? Then this is the game changer for you.

If there's one warrior who can make a seriously Chinese entrance, it's Samurai Jack.

And if there’s one game this year that will have you singing a different toon, it’s Cartoon Network: Punch Time Explosion. Busting up retail stores on the 8th of November (although the 3DS edition was released at the start of June 2011), this game may literally be the Mortal Kombat vs DC Universe of the animated kiddie world…except everyone’s from the same company. Crossing over characters from the boss to the confusingly accepted, such as Samurai Jack (pictured above), the Powerpuff Girls, Chowder, Flapjack, Ben “Ben 10″ Tennyson, and Dexter from his laboratory. The plot is so ridiculous and confusing, it hurts my brain trying to decipher it all on this post: but to make a long story short, the Announcer decides to watch Cartoon Network on a day off, but he realizes that all these shows are facing utter destruction. When I first saw this game, I was mad out of my wits. I was so angry, I made a bull in a rodeo look gentle. It was because there were no new (and actually important) people that had just started their lives on Cartoon Network. Mordecai, Rigby, Finn, Jake, all off the roster? Son, I wanted to sue Papaya Studio. But discovering that they were actually going to return for the Xbox and PS3 editions, I decided to cool my jets a little. And why does everyone love parodying Super Smash Bros. now? First Super Monkey Ball 3D included Monkey Fight, now this stealing the original format? And there’s still not some sort of interactive law against this…

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Want to keep track of the magazine’s site? Go to nintendopower.com and subscribe to it (also performable on Amazon) so you can get every single issue with 72% of the savings! Can you feel the power? Do you want more power? Then subscribe to Sammwak, and like this post if you blog here at WordPress. Want more Nintendo rave? Then keep rooting for more in the comment section!

Can you believe Sammwak has been running for almost 20 months now, and we’ve gotten over 40,000 hits? Keep going, and we’ll have the most epic party of our lives when we hit 100,000!…

- Sam

p.s. How do you get Pikachu onto a bus?…you poke-em-on! *lolololololololololol*….yeah, I didn’t think it was funny, either.

Jolly Good Bookie: Ghost of the Shipwreck


Hey guys it’s Sam, Tanzania’s typing terror, and if there’s one thing I do for a living, it’s read. Reading is the top support of my writing curriculum, let alone is it the most fun thing to do atop of it. Without books, I’d never have ideas for styling new comics. Speaking of books, guess who’s coming back to review another?…Yep, the jolly good bookie! Today’s book is the third of a companion series to Italy’s famed Geronimo Stilton…but it’s under Thea’s eyes now! Ladies and gentlemice, I present to you Thea Stilton and the Ghost of the Shipwreck.

The series beginning in April 2009 with The Dragon’s Code, this book follows the storyline that has been part of series lore for 2 years: Thea is Geronimo’s brother, and his polar opposite: when Geronimo is such a ‘fraidy mouse, Thea loves embarking on adventures across the globe! The story begins at Mouseford Academy, Thea’s school when she was young. She had a such a good time there that she returned to teach a journalism class. In this era, she met 5 special students: Nicky, Pamela, Colette, Paulina, and Violet. They all became great friends faster than a Cheez-It. They even named their group after Thea, and since, they have been known as the Thea Sisters. Isn’t that cute?

This following installment to The Mountain of Fire follows the Sisters to the discovery of a mysterious shipwreck off Whale Island during a marine biology lesson. Legend has it a diamond of all sorts of rarities called Jasmine’s Heart was aboard the ship when it sank. But that’s just the start. Professor van Kraken, biology teacher, vanishes, and the five must find him and the priceless jewel. And when they think it’s all over, they get an invitation to China for yet another lost treasure hunt! To make a long story short: someone must really like Clash of the Titans.

So the series’ first-ever double feature does follow the “villain is the least expected” format from a lot of books, but it garners what I call that Geronimo touch, rebalancing all the writing, illustration, and perspective to their most colorful. And Ghost of the Shipwreck isn’t half bad for a Geronimo-like book. I don’t even believe I have any flawing points to chew this book out for!

3 out of 5 – Educational value – Each mouse originates from a real-life country. Nicky is Australian, Colette is French, Paulina is Peruvian, Violet is Chinese, and Pamela (best for last!) is Tanzanian! And you may think all they do is sit around filing their nails, but actual facts come from the different places they trek into, such as learning undersea facts, and not just a taste, but a mouthful of Chinese culture.

2 out of 5 – Positive messages – Perseverance?

2 1/2 out of 5 – Positive role models – The Sisters do find a way out of aspects of trouble, and almost always find a way out of any bad situation. These are what people call “superthinkers”, the people that can rely on their mind to find a way to save their life.

5 out of 5 – Ease of readGhost of the Shipwreck is obviously a book all ages can enjoy. It doesn’t show any severe signs of violence whatsoever, it’s funny, informational, and the ultimate friendship. Amongst setting the blog record of scoring a perfect 5!

1 out of 5 – Violence – Some henchmen do interrupt a juggling show, so they get bombarded with eggs, fruit, and veggies.

1 out of 5 – Romance (love cannot be too inappropriate) – At the start of the book, Violet bears a “mega crush” on Professor van Kraken.

0 out of 5 - Language – Believe it or not, this is not shown here.

1 out of 5 – Product PlacementThea Stilton is a 2-year old companion series to Italy’s most famous “mouse author” 7-year old series, Geronimo Stilton.

0 out of 5 – Drinking, Drugs, and/or Smoking – This aspect is not featured. However, the mice do enjoy tea, which relates to coffee, and coffee…never mind, this aspect is not featured.

………………………………….

Entertainment: A+ (5 points)

Fun: A+ (5 points)

Smarts: A (4 points)

Style: A+ (5 points)

Read-Again Ratio: A+ (5 points)

Humor: A (5 points)

Final score: 29 out of 30 (EVEN CLOSER!), 5 stars out of 5

CONSENSUS: Ghost of the Shipwreck must be read, because it’s a perfect mix of every emotion rolled up into one, plus it’s peppered with undersea and Chinese-cultural facts that always keep the book going. If there’s a chart of 2010′s top 10 books, #3, #2, and #1 would all be Ghost of the Shipwreck.

FUN FACTS, GOOFS, AND OTHER SILLY STUFF: On page 108, when Madame Hu is trying to get her paws on a lacquer box, Colette says, “Paws off, cheddarface!”, which is coincidentally the name of Geronimo’s sixth book. Also, on the cover, you see that Colette (the blonde at the bottom) has a blue scuba wetsuit. But in the book, it is pink. I feel so guilty taking off that point for Smarts.

PRICE: Interested in getting the book? Swim over to Amazon and get it for 8 dollars (plus the new and used prices of $4.00 and 30 cents), or scurry over to Barnes & Noble for the same big price, but save 75% getting the marketplace version of just $2.

RENT, BUY, OR SKIP?: Brother, you shouldn’t even be asking that question after all this. YES, OF COURSE BUY! I’ve no doubt that this needn’t be skipped, or my name is not Sammwak!

………………………………..

So if you haven’t had the chance to read this series, don’t wait any longer! Go to the library, get one of their books, and embark alongside their adventures!

- Sam

p.s. If there’s one thing I have a habit of doing, it’s starting new blogs. After several failed experiments like Gamers United League, Sammwak en Espanol, and vice versa, I have settled on my legitimate companion blog…2Sam2Mwak! Named after Potter Puppet Pals creator Neil Cicierega’s 2nd channel (2Neil2Cicierega), and honoring several famous YouTubers’ second channels (freddiew2 and finebros2, for instance), I’ll have even more juice that goes more behind-the-scenes than ever before! Stay tuned for the world premiere of 2Sam2Mwak on October 28, the nearest I could ever get to the Halloween special without intersecting into it!

 

 

Time for Tunes – A Boy Named Sue


Recognize this face? Yup, it’s the one and only Shel Silverstein, the one who gave us the thumbsucking epidemic song I took a look at earlier last month. Shel may be one of the weirdest guys I’ve met since my classmates on Backwards Day. Anyway, Shel’s got a lucky thumb to A) not to be sucked, and B) to get another spot on T4T, this time for his timeless song “A Boy Named Sue”.

This song was so popular, its name even had to be in the name of this album, where the song came from.

“…my name is Sue! How do you do? Now you’re gonna die!”

Surprisingly enough, “A Boy Named Sue” (also incorrectly referred to as “Boy Named Sue“) is not entirely of Shel’s work. He was just the writer of the song, the real user of this song (besides Shel) being Johnny Cash on his 1969 live album, At San Quentin. It has to be one the weirdest, funniest, and most violent songs I’ve ever listened since Avenged Sevenfold’s “Beast and the Harlot” went to the Guitar Hero 2 track list. The album A Boy Named Sue and his Country Songs coincidentally released the same year of Cash’s live album, both scoring Grammy Awards for their versions of the song in the process.

The storyline revolves around…well, title says all, a boy named Sue. Named as a joke by his father, he becomes the laughingstock of the area, but he’s the one that gets to the last laugh when he grows up to be a hard-hitting master of mass destruction, even beating up his own father as a revenge plan. The song is very groovy especially for one of Shel’s works, and especially deserves to be recited by a bored farmer in a rocking chair.

0 out of 5 – Positive messages – The song being revolved around violence for the most part, this song lacks any positive messages whatsoever.

1 out of 5 – Positive role models – Sue does show good examples of bravery, standing up against the toughest of moments revolving around that dastardly name.

4 out of 5 – Violence – Have you been listening to all that I’ve been talking about so far? “A Boy Named Sue” gives violence a new name, and I still can’t believe they got that crazy back in the sixties!

  • Sue narrates that if a guy laughed at his name, he’d bust his head.
  • Upon seeing and recognizing his long-lost dad, he simply beats him up, throwing a chair across his teeth, giving him a haymaker between the eyes, and almost threatening to kill him if his profound love didn’t change him. His father also extremely violently rebounds, knifing off some of his ear.
  • At the very end of the song, Sue lashes out against his name, and his reactions to it if he ever heard or saw it, or his father, again.

1 1/2 out of 5 – Inappropriate Content (saying the S word would be vulgar) – Besides violence, the only thing that’s not really appropriate, or nice, is the gender shaming and male stereotypical themes this song has.

2 out of 5 - Language – The worst word encountered isn’t even dirty, but it’s “heck.” Shel did a good job of replacing Cash’s dirty lyrics with new, clean ones. The two points of language points to Cash’s version of the song this time, ranging from “son-of-a-B word” to the H word.

1 out of 5 – Product Placement – Shel was one of the 60s’ most famed artists in almost every category on the stardom ladder. Music, books, movies, you name it, he’s stuck his head into it.

1 out of 5 – Drinking, Drugs, and/or Smoking – Shel and Cash both refer at the start of the song, to the father of Sue leaving behind a half-filled (Shel)/empty (Cash) bottle of booze.

The first couple of lyrics in Johnny Cash's version of "A Boy Named Sue", chronicled in an impressive black-and-white comic style.

Entertainment: A (5 points)

Laughs: B+ (4 points)

Style: B (3 points)

Smarts: A- (4 points)

Fun: A (4 points)

Final score: 2o out of 30 (Over halfway there)

Rating: E 10+ (Shel’s version), T (Cash’s version) (do I have to talk it over again?)

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Click on the video to listen to Shel’s version of “A Boy Named Sue”.

Click on this video to watch almost six minutes of a segment of the foul-mouthed Johnny Cash’s show, shown in 1970, released online in 2008 to over 200,000 views. This video does feature a quick duet with the two creators of the song, also featuring a touching Shel solo to “Daddy, What If”.

“A Boy Named Sue” is a blast listening to, and your inside self is going to be laughing its head off while getting seriously grossed out at the same time, but overall, it’s one of Shel’s best songs. End of story.

Like what you saw? Subscribe for more, and if you blog here at WordPress, there’s that little button with a star on it that says ‘Like’. Click that. Did you do it? You should. I also may not be up to date with blogging after this, because the entire Moorsbridge 5th grade is headed to Sherman Lake camp! So, check out my other posts to do you time here on Sammwak!

- Sam

p.s. And to bid you a good farewell, I will give you a Shel-style goodbye poem:

Goodbye, goodbye, I hope you come back

To Sammwak here, and that’s a fact

Over 40,000 hits to date

To all of those I can’t relate

So always remember to come back

And enjoy the glory of what is Sammwak!

Back to School…and One Post a Week


Hey guys it’s Sam, and I’ve gotten into a little curveball on blogging schedules. I haven’t exactly been up with schedules to date. Why? Because I’ve been sick. With Bieber fe–no, seriously. I’m not joking. My nose is running like the Niagara, and my throat hurts more than an iron maiden torture device. Okay, maybe I was exaggerating on that, but I’m under legitimate illness. (Take a pause to sneeze) Sorry.

And since the 2011-2012 school year has begun, Sammwak is falling under its biggest shadow….one post a week! Sorry folks, but what a father says happens. And to think that I released five posts a day when I started this blog. So starting today, Sammwak is breaking down to one post a week, and one post only. Still really sorry. But you can still check back to Sammwak every Monday for “more where that came from!”

- Sam

p.s. This blog was shown to some of my aunt’s hospital workers, and they don’t believe that this is by just a 10-year old! Fight the power of the writing curriculum, baby!