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Hey guys it’s Sam, and I’ve decided to host an award show. You’re probably rolling on the floor laughing out loud (ROTFLOL), asking yourself, “How can this little kid host such a big show?” Well, it’s your votes that count, and the nominee with the most votes wins a nice Sammwak Award!

The first category, churned out in bed just past 11:00, is the best animated movie. And your nominees are…

Don’t tango with Rango. Gore Verbinski’s spaghetti Western comedy follows the chameleon Rango as he stumbles off his owner’s car and into the lawless Old Western town of Dirt. He carries zeal to become the new sheriff and the first good guy upon Dirt’s graveyard full of them. It just came out on DVD and Blu-Ray, it had its debut release on March 4 by Paramount, almost 2 weeks before St. Patrick’s Day. And good luck it did get with nonstop critical praise, and a #2 rank on Charter On Demand. Can Rango tango down with a nice golden Sammwak Award?

Feeling despicable? The director’s team of Pierre Coffin and Chris Renaud was too, so they drank from a rusty bucket of water, and thus created Despicable Me. Universal Pictures is behind this 3D adventure, as Gru, the second-most evil super villain (behind Vector, the villain with magnitude) inherits three orphaned girls as pawns for his crime of the century…stealing the moon. But he finds out that their love for him is profoundly changing him, much to his partner’s (Dr. Nefario) dismay. He’s stuck with the decision between staying super bad, or becoming a super dad. What’s really super is how much success it got, critical and in the box office. Coughing up more than $530 million, as well as 2011 KCA, can Gru get the final inspiration to finish that shrink ray with a shiny golden Sammwak Award?

This is the final challenge. The biggest of all. This is the movie that beat out Rango as the #1 title on Charter On Demand. It is…Rio. We haven’t had much animal comedies with much music, but 20th Century Fox brought back what we needed for sure. The movie tells the story of the blue macaw Blu, shipped to Rio de Janeiro to mate with a female. That female does turn out to be the bird of his dreams, Jewel. This mating duo works together to escape from the smuggling clutches of the cockatoo Nigel. But you know what they couldn’t escape…success. It was a bomb that blew up so far, they needed to make an app with the Angry Birds! (the chronological third, behind Seasons and the original) But can it fly far enough to catch a Sammwak Award on its path?

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Those are your three choices of the best animated movie. Vote, vote, vote, and whoever gets the most votes wins a Sammwak Award! Start voting…now!

– Sam

p.s. Toy Story 3 is also a nominee, but the stupid Poll-daddy mechanics wouldn’t let me in on a fourth pick. You can also vote for TS3 if you want, as well as others you enjoy. Just a clarification.

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Hey, guys it’s Sam. And do you remember the sensational night of the 2011 Kids Choice Awards show? Now it’s been buzzing in my brain for some time, the seed planted in my frontal lobe of my brain. And as it’s been growing roots and shoots and stems and flowers, actually ever since I saw the music video to “Whip My Hair”, I knew that I wanted to make my OWN award show.

You’re probably fallen from your chair ROFLMAO right now, asking yourself over and over, “How in the world can one 10-year old boy manage a giganomotrous award show? It must be some sort of silly joke!”

Well, me, myself, and my flower brain have got it all down. All YOU have to do is VOTE. I’ll post the nominees up here on Sammwak, and you can vote in the polls featured in each post, and see who will win an oh-so-honoring ROFLCopter Award!

A nice ROFLCopter dipped in gold, baby!

Think of the ROFL Awards as the KCAs, but the categories are stretched. Here’s how our little routine will unfold:

Step 1: I will show my first nominee for a certain category in a post, adding a poll for votes to be cast.

Step 2: You will view the post and vote in the poll which nominee should deserve a ROFLCopter Award.

Step 3: In some time, I will accumulate all the votes and declare the ROFLCopter winner of each category every day on Sammwak!

Dead simple, right? See how efficient it is? That’s how this award show’s gonna roll. Today’s category is Favorite TV Show, and your nominees are…

iCarly was launched on Nick in September 2007 (a great show for kids just leaping into school again) and became one of Nick’s most famed shows in its time, let alone it being a teen sitcom. The show is mostly known for its web show iCarly existent on the show and in real life, starring host Carly Shay (Miranda Cosgrove) and friends, co-host Sam Puckett (Jennette McCurdy) and technical producer Freddie Benson (Nathan Kress). It currently airs on Nick today in its fourth season, finishing its upcoming crossover episode, iParty With Victorious coming in June. It has already won a shiny KCA for 2009, 2010, and 2011! Will its romance, hilarity, and charisma make its way to a shiny ROFLCopter?

Fun fact: The exterior shots of Carly’s apartment building Bushwell Plaza are actually digital alterations of pics of the Eastern Columbia Building in L.A.!

Victorious boogied its way to Nick airings in March 2010, and has been one of Nick’s most blooming teen sitcoms since. When Tori Vega (Victoria Justice) consumes the chance of a lifetime of being a student at the elite Hollywood Arts, she gets tangled in quirky screwball situations, like trying to pass the Bird Scene, having the face of a zombie, and more. Although critics have given it mixed reviews, its viewership is still strong. The show and its feminine star, Victoria Justice, have both been nominated for awards twice (the show for a Teen Choice Award, and a UK KCA, and Victoria for a KCA and a Teen Icon Award), but can they finally win their first award: a glimmering ROFLCopter?

Fun fact: The theme song of the show, “Make It Shine”, peaked at number sixteen on Billboard‘s Bubbling Under Hot 100 Singles chart in the United States!

Peaking Disney Channel in September 2008, The Suite Life On Deck has since been one of Disney Channel’s top shows, full of romance, drama, and comedy. It is the sequel/spin-off to the 2005-2008 Disney Channel show, The Suite Life of Zack & Cody. Cody, Zack, and London are returning characters on the SS Tipton, students at “Seven Seas High”. Moseby also returns as ship manager. The show has also collaborated with Disney shows Wizards of Waverly Place and Hannah Montana to make the trilogy of crossover episodes called Wizards on Deck with Hannah Montana. The show has won many awards such as Young Artist Awards and BMI Awards. It got beat out by iCarly for the fave TV show in the 2011 KCAs, but can they strike back with a sparkling ROFLCopter?

Fun Fact: Doc Shaw, known for playing Marcus Little on the show, left in the third season of On Deck due to committing to appear in the Disney XD series, Pair of Kings.

Good Luck Charlie gurgled its way to Disney Channel in April 2010, and after bringing Disney positive feedback, this sitcom has not failed since. It takes place with the Duncans, a family trying to adjust to the birth of their fourth child, Charlotte “Charlie” Duncan. The other children are Teddy Duncan who often creates video diary entries containing counsel for Charlie, PJ Duncan, a rather talented slacker who also founded the band “PJ and the Vibe”, and Gabe Duncan, just that mischievous kid of every family. They each deal with screwball challenges in their life, in school, at home, or out in the town. Bridgit has won a Popstar! Magazine award for Female Newcomer, and Bradley with a Young Artist Award for best performance in a TV series, and a young supporting actor. Can a sparkling ROFLCopter bump up the amount?

Fun fact: A Good Luck Charlie DCOM is currently undergoing filming with Disney Channel and Salty Pictures. The film is about the Duncans celebrating Christmas.

Wizards of Waverly Place is one of Disney Channel’s most famed teen sitcoms since its crazy big debut in October 2007, and romance, wizardry, and barrels of adventure have kept its pace. Even someone with half a brain could decipher what the show’s about: The Russo kids, Alex, Justin, and Max are wizards in Manhattan on Waverly Place, and they have to keep their secret safe in the big world. When they complete training, they enter a wizard competition to see who can keep their wizard powers and–better yet–become the family wizard of that generation. This plot-line has given Disney supposedly positive critical feedback, even to make its own DCOM. And after a history of award accumulation, can they make magic one more time to claim a ROFLCopter?

Fun fact: There will be a second DCOM as a sequel to Wizards of Waverly Place confirmed June 2010. Mason and Rosie will appear, and Dan Berendsen will return as script writer.

Yeah, I know, it’s a tricky decision. But that’s what makes award shows FUN! You strain and struggle as you decide between your last two wants, and finally you pick one over the other, making a difference to a celebrity’s heart while crushing the other’s heart…Okay, I admit I was a little cruel on that last one.

So, the nominees are in, now we just gotta cast in some votes! So, who’s YOUR want for Favorite TV Show in the ROFL Awards? (If you’re not a fan of any four of my nominees, TYPE IN YOUR OWN want and maybe that could win the award!)

I guess that’s all for a golden edition of Sammwak. Keep your eyes peeled for more categories, and–especially–the results and WINNERS!

Yours truly,

Sam Mwakasisi ;)