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Hey guys it’s Sam. I guess now that technology is at its prime, WordPress has been able to incorporate Vines into blog posts via their embed codes. And coincidentally I’ve seen a lot of hilarious Vines in the past few weeks. So, without further ado, I present the first volume of my funniest Vine compilation.

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Now, wasn’t that a blast? Did it make you laugh? Of course it did, so be sure to check out the original creators of the Vines for even more hilarious stuff! I’ll be sure to put up volume two sometime in the future, but for know tune in every Friday at 1:00 PM for more awesomeness courtesy of Sammwak! Oh, and have a rad summer!

Stay classy America,

~S~ 😎



Hey it’s Sam with another great YouTube treasure, mateys! (Why do I keep saying that?) And if you are a modern-day person, don’t watch TV, and/or might not have a life, you may not know Looney Tunes. Be as it may, it may be the most timeless cartoon the networks have ever seen. And now that it’s gotten a 2011 rejuvenation, we now know it with The Looney Tunes Show, bringing every old-school character and possibly converting them into the most new-school people I’ve seen. And that’s what today is about. While we may not be focusing on the show in general, we’re focusing on one of my favorite aspects of the show: “Merrie Melodies”.

This is the title card of the first Merrie Melody from the thirties.

Merrie Melodies are songs (usually 2 min. at most) featuring classic Looney Tunes characters singing original songs. If you don’t ROFL at these videos, then you have no emotion. Hands down. There are actually lots of YouTubers that release TLTS melodies. And I actually give you extra points if you have some of these on iTunes or Windows Media Player (at least a music player in general). Some videos have gotten over 100,000 views while others haven’t, but it’s the song that counts.

This first song is about Chickenhawk, a hawk who loves chicken. Crispy, glazed, baked, fried…come on, he eats chicken cake for his birthday. (130,000 views since May 2011.)

The next song is about Elmer Fudd’s love for grilled cheese sandwiches. I do criticize him, because he rejects a burger, a shake, a cake, and a steak for that cheese! (Now that’s what I call true love.) >:-( 100,000 views since May 2011. )-:<

Another song stars Marvin the Martian, and he sings about how he’s really a good guy despite being from Mars. He shares cheese pizza and lemonade, and–oh, this is the best part–he’s the ultimate host of puppies; he makes them in his lab. (20,000 views since June 2011. And yes…this is Cartoon Network’s channel.)

The final song is a love song. But not any love song. It stars Lola. Yeah, that crazy psycho stalker bunny after Bugs. She tries to tell him he’s in love, but he tries to get out of it in every way possible…even if he has to go tooth-and-nail on her. (Almost 100,000 views since July 2011.)

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So for any of you who don’t watch this show yet, I have four reasons why you should. In fact, you just saw them. So catch The Looney Tunes Show Tuesdays at 8:00 on Cartoon Network! It’s actually better than you think…;)

Your blogger,

Sam

p.s. This post is dedicated to my friends, Benny and Jerry Kagumba. Why? Because they were the first to witness this awesomeness…and they’ve been with me for years now. So, if you’re reading this, this is in your honor.



Hey it’s Sam, and here’s another YouTube treasure I dug up, mateys! Today’s treasure is actually not just from one user…it’s from three! I just felt like it, because today is Thursday. A triple Thursday of treasures. These YouTube stars are famous online and off, and are actually huge icons. The first YouTube star is the king of VFX (video effects, for all of you who don’t do abbreviations) mastery, Frederick “Freddie” Wong, or as his username goes by, freddiew. He has over 30 million channel views, and over one million subscribers.

The first video is a real-life tribute to an infinitely looping gif which you can find here. It’s called “Big Blue Ball Machine”, and currently stands with over one million views since July 16.

The next one is called “Arcade Dominator”, where Wong heads to the arcade and dominates all, from air hockey to a perfect skeeball game to a flawless Guitar Hero shredding session. This video has over 5 million views since the 4th of…June. Pwned.

This final one is called “Real Life Mario Kart”, bringing back Mario Kart 64 in 2011. This video has over 11 million views since February 17…my birthday! πŸ˜€

Freddie has a bigger-than-life backstory behind him. He competed in the 2007 World Series of Video Games, walking away with first prize for Guitar Hero 2. (if you saw Arcade Dominator, you know he rules at GH.) He performed at YouTube Live in 2008, and is prone for guest stars in his videos, such as Ray William Johnson in “Troll Massacre”, and William and Dylan from KIDS REACT in “Jedi A-Holes Strike Back”. Onto the next star!

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If you’re Brazilian, you can’t say you don’t know Joe Penna, or MysteryGuitarMan. He makes music out of stuff you wouldn’t expect to be musical, such as with balloons in “Pop”, with buildings in “Jumbo”, and with one thousand guitars in “1000 Guitars”. He has over 35 million channel views, and has surpassed the one-million-subscriber mark.

This first one is called “Bubble Rap”, consisting of lots of bubble wrap, a guitar, and DeStorm as the rapper. Over a million views since May 14, 2011.

The next one is “Pop”, which I told you is consisted of lots of balloons, and a piano. Almost at 3.5 million views since May 11, 2010.

The final one is “Happy Mouth”, featuring Joe singing “Don’t Worry, Be Happy” with the sounds conducted by his mouth, like a bass, an angelic choir, and hi-hats.

Joe has not only been in a McDonald’s Coke commercial, but he ranks as the ninth-most subscribed YouTuber to date, dethroning the Annoying Orange but being dethroned by Shane Dawson’s second channel. Now, our third and final star!

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Epic Meal Time is from Canada, which is no surprise why they take foods to the total extreme. If you’re ever called down to lunch and you aren’t hungry, watch some Epic Meal Time and you’ll be hungrier than a starving Sim. Almost 25 million channel views and over a million subscribers as we speak. The eighth-most viewed in Canada, and the most gnarliest foods since Man vs Food…maybe even gnarlier.

The first one cooks up a meatball deathstar, a whole bunch of cooked pasta stuffed inside a meatball covered with cheese…your mouth started watering, right? If you ain’t down with meatballs, and you ain’t down with almost 3.5 million views (since December 14, 2010), you ain’t down to no nothing!

Next, sushi and fast food finally fuse together to create the ultimate “fast food sushi”. Since December 7, it has over 5 million views. γŠγ„γ—γ„! That’s Japanese for “delicious”!

The final video is just salad. Without all the healthy stuff. Take your greens, and turn them into teins…proteins! That’s right, we got a meat salad with flank steak lettuce, spiced-up pepperoni carrots, meatball radishes, cucumber sausages, and Epic Meal Time ain’t epic without bits…beer bacon bits!

And if you think this is a carnivore’s dream come true, it doesn’t stop there. They’re live at Comic Con, and you go to Netflix.com/bacon, and watch some Kevin Bacon! Am I right, Internet?

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That marks the end of another video effective, musical, and tasty YouTube treasure. From now on, check back every other Friday (which means a treasure one Friday, a regular post the next, and then another treasure the next) for more YouTube treasures, mateys!

– Sam

p.s. Have I told you about my brother’s site? Probably not. It’s based on ways you can be successful in everyday life. From social medial abuse to the perfect relationship to letting go of a loved one, my brother Chris Mwakasisi could probably hook you up with some gnarly innovation.



Hey guys it’s Sam, sorry for the hiatus, I have been whipping up some new videos with my webcam! πŸ˜€ Anyways, I’m back with another YouTube Treasure (sorry if they’re getting old). I know. We’ve been having a YouTube fest. Emma Watson socking an interviewer, a finger frenzy, all the videos I included in my 4th of July celebratory post. I guess, now it’s more LOL! πŸ˜‰ Now, this treasure is a test. An ultimate test…no, the ultimate test. The hardest challenge you’ll ever take. Harder than the Moron Test, even. Can you sit through these videos without laughing your head off? If you can, you are not only titled “stone hearted”, but you get two legendary Sammwak collectibles: an actual stone heart, and the pork pie hat of Buster Keaton, who in the 1900’s, was known as the “Great Stone Face”!

The videos, in their order, were a 4-second animation of the Rage Guy (published by sr50cent). For Rage fans, this video is hilarious, so why did it get only 130,000 views (since Sep 2010)?! It’s the best 4 seconds of your life; you just don’t know it yet. Sometime in the middle of the night you’ll wake up screaming, “FUUUUUUUUUUUUUU” I just know you will.

The next one was a video from August 2009, with publisher bramslaets daring the viewer to watch it without laughing. (It’s really called, “try to watch this without laughing”. It had 2 years to become the next Nyan Cat, but it only racked up half a million views! How can you not enjoy a prancing rainbow Bunchie? When I first saw this, I was ROFLMFAO. Even Fick said, “Thanks to this video, I dream happy dreams of me dancing with Bunchies on a rainbow, thanks to this video” on Facebrook the other day.

The next one was a scene from the timeless comedy Napoleon Dynamite, when he dances his illegal government ninja butt off! There’s actually an awful lot of copies of the scene, let alone them being remade (one from mauricio890 getting over 2 million views!), but the real one from markthehat66 scored over half a million views since December 2010, which is pretty strong for a 6-month duration of time to get viral. (770,000 to be exact) And according to the video’s page on YouTube, it said that the video was seen on the channel The Stranger, Seattle’s Only Newspaper. Now that would be an article I’d tune into.

A “fans-have-been-waiting-for-this-so-long” video of Joe Jonas dancing to Beyonce’s “Single Ladies” was next, racking up over 25 million views since June 2009 (a 2 week countdown to the release of their album, Lines, Vines, and Trying Times) coincidentally from JonasBrothersMusic. For 2 years for viral possibilities, that has to be one of the biggest online breakthroughs I’ve seen! (Shane Dawson even reacted to it!) It’s like “Bieber After the Dentist”—it had only one viral-possibility year, and look how well it did! 32 million views well!

The penultimate video, an Autotuned remix of CopperCab’s timeless “GINGERS DO HAVE SOULS!!” video, racked up 4 million views since February 2010 (coincidentally my birth month!) thanks to publisher placeboing. This has quickly become my most favorable Autotune remix ever (the grooviest, funniest, and second-shortest too)! And they obviously have to allow downloadable MP3 at Mediafire.com! But this will probably teach you a good message. You’ll wake up at midnight, saying, “Oh, gingers DO have souls!”

The final video, and the oldest, coolest, and EPIC WIN-est, dates all the way back to November 2005 from superbkid! It’s apparently a message, at a theater, before beginning 2005’s Chicken Little (conveniently, released in November!), telling the audience to turn off their phones in the most innovative way possible…Chicken Little dancing his tail feather off to O-Zone’s “Numa Numa”! Then, obviously, his phone rings halfway through the dance which leads him to get smushed. That’s 6 years ago, and it racked up a mind blowing 15 million views!…which is what I expected for a video like this. πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€

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So, tell me guys: when did you laugh? (Leave a comment telling me when!) Don’t fake it. I know you cracked up one way or another. If you didn’t…slap yourself upside the head and get a sense of humor, buster! Just kidding…but seriously. If you didn’t crack a smile through the whole show…then congratulations! You have earned this achievement!…

Stone Hearted – Think you got what it takes to complete the ultimate test? Sit through the videos without cracking a smile! (50 BP)

…and these dandy collectible, again, a stone heart… …and the pork pie hat of the Great Stone Face himself, Buster Keaton! Absolutely priceless upon your success!

Check back for more tests, more treasures, and more time with me here at Sammwak!

– Sam

p.s. I’m going to be learning at VBS (Vacation Bible School) this coming week starting tomorrow (which means sleeping 9:00 pm-early >:-o), and this year’s theme is Operation Space! (Last year was The Egypt File, and the year before that was Gadget’s Garage, and so on.) So, first we contacted with God through a teen genius and his robot, then we contacted him in an Egyptian pyramid style, and now we contact with him in an intergalactic style? St. Mike just isn’t running out of ideas. πŸ˜‰



Hey, it’s Sam, and we’ve dug up another YouTube treasure, mateys! Fans of Harry Potter? This treasure will leave you stupefied for more! Okay, so Hermione–sorry, Emma Watson–is getting interviewed for Prisoner of Azkaban. The interviewer mentions how Hermione “socked it to” Draco in the movie, and a good “sock” it was. And out of nowhere, he says that he wants Emma to punch him. I’m not lying. He really said it. You can even check the video if you want to. I don’t know how many 5-Hour Energies he had to drink to work up the nerve to say that. And amidst his begging, Emma really sucker punches him hard. Even costing him a couple teeth. If the tooth fairy comes tonight, that guy will be a thousandaire tomorrow morning. πŸ˜€

I mean seriously, when Muggles get mad, they get mad! Now, this video got almost 4.5 million views since its release back in January 2006 by christmassacre, so we’re all not really surprised how it went viral. Over 5,000 people liked this video, but almost 500 dislikes grew. Why are there any dislikes? Maybe, besides those overprotective parents. And again, the video isn’t even that long, it’s only almost a minute long. And to tie in, I’ll show you the other video of Hermione sucker punching Draco.

Now this video is almost at 50,000 views, so it’s not strongly viral otherwise. Even if it was released last year in April. When Sammwak basically started. But the surprising note of over 100 likes and absolutely no dislikes is a shocker of awesomeness. Good job, Pokehero2009. This mostly got comments about how Hermione did the sock-it-to-em on Draco, and how he deserved it, and how people kept pressing the seven button…

So this is an important life lesson: never mess with a Muggle, let alone Hermione. 😦 I even got this pic sent by her!

So, remember that, and I’ll see you when we dig up our next YouTube treasure! πŸ˜‰

Later, Sam



Hey guys it’s Sam, and as you should know, I provide lots of YouTube videos here. And I also like scavenging randomly and absentmindedly on other videos. People make plenty of crazy videos on YouTube, many supported by some famous whatchamacallits: the green/blue screen chroma key, a huge whatchamacallit in the entertainment industry, making you appear someplace like the Oval Office without actually going there, and Adobe After Effects, the biggest whatchamacallit for surreal moments like bullet hits or explosions. Well, YouTube is mostly not only for celebrity gossiping, but for people’s entertainment. And they have reached that milestone greatly. That’s why I’m launching a new segment on Sammwak based on the cool videos I find on everyday YouTube. In our pilot, you remember the 5.3 million hit-wonder of Justin Bieber getting smacked upside the head with that “water bottle”, right?

Well, some YouTuber named BartBaKer took that footage, and Autotuned it into a remixed song! It’s only gotten past 4.2 million views with over 25,000 likes, but I think it should go higher. Can we make that happen? πŸ˜‰ πŸ˜€

Like the videos? Then like this post down below, please! (d^_^b)

And don’t forget to check back for more YouTube Treasures on Sammwak! Want one of your top ROFLCopter videos (ones that make you ROFL) on my next post? Comment me your suggestions, and you could be responsible for the next YouTube Treasure!

Yours truly,

Sam

p.s. Justin Bieber was never hit with a water bottle at all. That “bottle” was actually a bag of Sour Patch Kids, and a T-shirt wrapped in Christmas paper, according to BartBaKer. πŸ˜€

p.p.s. Happy Father’s Day to any daddy out there reading this! Baba siku ya furaha! (Swahili) Feliz dia del padre! (Spanish) Padre felice del giorno! (Italian) Heureux pΓ¨re de jour! (French) May YouTube bless you and shine upon you every day you live, and give you peace. Amen. πŸ˜‰

p.p.s.s. The post isn’t over yet. Since these pesky videos wouldn’t cooperate with me up there, let alone in a whole group, I’m gonna have to put one down here. These were made by the channel FunnyOrDie (I have a microscopic knowledge of them.) and they might be the feature of the show! Today, Bieber stars in the best five seconds of the world, which sparked more than 6 million views and 10,000 likes!



Hello there, viewers. It’s me, Sam. And it’s time to take a look and reminisce back in time. Go back to the 1990s, where Street Fighter II changed the face of fighting forever, Mario Kart 64 made a slam-bang drift into our hearts, and that good Crash Bandicoot arrived. But in the 1990s, there was also another time. The time where TV ratings got so low, that a bunch of animated cartoons started swallowing airing times. Some people call it the “invasion of the animation.” Others the “cartoon boom.” I call it “Nickelodeon in the 90s.”

Nick, as we all know it is today, is the top cable channel since April 1979, not to be confused with its launch on December 1977 as “Pinwheel.” It was also literally the first channel aiming at kids, dating back to Pinwheel days. But Nickelodeon really did have lots of cartoons in the 90s. I even have a good list of them: Angry Beavers, Hey Arnold!, and even Rugrats. But one show really stood out that I enjoy today. Yes, it was animated. It was hilarious, life-oriented, and a total fit-in with my comic writing. That show was called…

Doug. Not much afterward, just Doug. If you’ve ever heard of this post a little or a lot, please like this post at the bottom.

Doug was one of Nick’s many TV series involved in the cartoon boom. Running from 1991 to 1994, then getting picked up by Disney from 1996 to 1999 (ending actually after SpongeBob began), the show was based on its titular protagonist, Doug–I dare you to try not to laugh or grin–Funnie. A grade-schooler from Bloatsburg into Bluffington, the show follows the exploits of Doug and his misadventures on and off school. How this ties into my comic writing is that Doug is an actual comic-maker himself. His comic characters are superhero Quailman, secret agent Smash Adams,Β  explorer Race Canyon, crime-stopper the Chameleon, cowboy Durango Doug, outlaw Jack Bandit, and Wafflestomper.

One thing I liked about it was its short but sweet and epic theme song, composed by genius Fred Newman. I think it was the theme that got me hooked in the first place. I mean, come on, dude. How can you stare ahead and ignore a theme song like THIS?

It’s just impossible.

Well, I guess that’s all for now. Check out YouTube for more Doug!

– Sam