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Hey guys it’s Sam, and I feel like digging something. Just uprooting something from the earth. Oh, which reminds me…it’s time for another YouTube treasure that needs discovering, mateys! This time, I’m going to talk about someone who has been putting smiles on our face since the summer of 2006. A man that maintains three channels weekly and still pulls it off, a man that has made its way to even merchandise. He has over a million subscribers on YouTube (including me for all 3 of his channels), over 200,000 followers on Twitter, and over 100,000 likes on Facebook. Whether it’s his Cute Win Fail series, or his Literal trailers, or his Lazy Vlogs or Let’s Plays, you must not be watching enough YouTube if you don’t know that this guy’s ranked among the top 30 YouTubers. His name is Toby Tobuscus [Joe] Turner, known simply as Tobuscus.

“Do-do, do-do-do-do-do-DO, subscribe!”

– The official Tobuscus theme song

Besides being a YouTube personality, Toby (also a close friend of iJustine, and confirmed-to-be-fake girlfriend) has also tried his hands at acting and stand-up comedy. He was born in March 1985, a couple months before the primetime release of Super Mario Bros. His first video demonstrated what Toby would do with the remote from Click (released on the same day of the video), and its quick popularity gave Toby his YouTubing start. That video currently has over 400,000 views. Believe it or not, Tobuscus was not Toby’s first-ever channel; it instead was his “LazyVlog” second channel, TobyTurner, launched a month before Tobuscus. 4 years later, TobyGames, the third out of 3 channels, came to be and became Toby’s official gaming channel, since his gaming videos were originally on TobyTurner. His most famous video remains the Literal Assassin’s Creed: Brotherhood trailer at over 20 million views. TobyGames ranks #83 on the top 100 YouTubers’ list at 899 thousand subscribers, matter of fact, even beating David Guetta’s channel. Lemme show you some examples of what you would find @ all 3 of his channels:

“That was rhetorical, you know I am the oracle, I know you like my sword, it’s made of frickin’ diamonds…”

It’s been 4 days and this video has already gone past the one-million-view mark. This video is called “I Can Swing My Sword!” from Tobuscus (the main channel), talking about how much a diamond sword means to a Minecraft-turned Toby, and it meansa lotto that fella. By the way, diamond swords are the highest ranks of swords ever in the game of Minecraft. This very song inspired me to change my Google icon from a Raccoon Tail Mario to a diamond sword (a decision I currently do not regret), and the song will forever be my “ultimate diamond sword theme song anthem”. The spot-on animations were provided by the fellow YouTube channel GonzoSSM, whose videos consist entirely of these animations. The two channels have collaborated on other Tobuscus videos like “Safety Torch“, the “Tobuscus Adventures” series, the “Animated Tobuscus” videos, the timeless hit “Nugget in a Biscuit“, among others. This same video was released on TobyTurner under the name “Minecraft Diamond Sword Song” a while after the Tobuscus version, which is the reason why it has only almost 200,000 hits. He ranks as the twenty-fifth most subscribed channel of all time, #10 in the Directors division, and #50 most viewed in the Directors division. And he has a whole lotta other honors.

“Audience? Wha-what are you doing [please insert scenario]?”

This is one of Toby’s many Lazy Vlogs, released on April Fools Day 2 weeks ago, and it’s called “April Fools Day Disease“, currently at over 100,000 hits. These kind of videos can range upon subjects like recently-heard tweets, the origin of Tobuscus, and real-life Minecraft objects (there is one for the diamond sword and one for the diamond pickaxe). Anyway, the channel releases a new vid almost every day, and has over 600,000 subscribers and over 100 million video views. Toby’s companion channel ranks as the #1 subscribed channel in the Reporters division, #3 this month, and #12 most viewed. In this video, Toby talks about how sick he is, among other topics. And like this post if you feel bad for him about that.

Sometimes on Toby’s third channel, he’ll make little 1-minute snippets of his videos, and they’re quite diverse since Toby’s usual Let’s Play series go for at least 100 videos apiece, no lie. This one is a Skyrim snippet called “My Son Is A Failure“, featuring Toby making uncivilized remarks against a giant, and eventually boasting about his win over the beast with a little too large of arrow use. These videos alone can reach 100,000 views apiece on average, surprisingly enough. He currently has play-throughs for Legend of Zelda: Skyward Sword, Halo Reach, Minecraft (not big surprise), Limbo, Skyrim, Rayman Origins, among others. Ever since summer 2010, he is the eighty-second most subscribed channel of all time, with almost 896 thousand subscribers and over 300 million video views, making him #10 at both most viewed and subscribed, in the Gurus division.


Tobuscus has also been no stranger to memes online. He has an article on Know Your Meme (currently being researched & evaluated), and here are some of his meme entries:

See? Oh, I think I should probably wrap this one up. Thanks for joining me at Sammwak, and be a doll and make sure you rate, comment, like, share, etc. for this post, and make sure you subscribe to both me and Tobuscus! He’s got some pretty sweet stuff, guys. You can also follow me at Google+ or send me an email (samgwamaka@gmail) if you feel like it! Now if you’ll excuse me, [feel free to insert your own scenario].

Required channels to subscribe to:

– Sam

p.s. Time for our Would You Rather o’ the Week! Would you rather…play every good game or play every bad game, but get $1,000 for every bad game you play? Respond in the comments below or by any other purposes: mail, email, owls, I dunno. 😀

Hey guys it’s Sam, and my birthday is now just four days away. Can I get some applause?********Thank you. Now, it’s time for another time to dig up a fresh YouTube treasure, mateys! Our last treasure took place 2 weeks ago in a rather dorkly series of events, so it should be time to dig up another one, right? A lot of people make a lot of stick figure videos on YouTube (even I was originally capable of doing so, but I was underage at the time), and with a lucky run, they go viral. And by viral, I mean at least 10 million views apiece. I know a lot of stick figure videos out there aren’t at milestones this high (but are still hoping to do so), but there’s only one person I know who has done so. His name is , and whether you’ve heard of his “ASDF (pronounced as-duff) Movie” series or not, he’s a pretty funny guy, and I’ve got proof.

Rated E10+ for ages 10 and up for violence including blood, fire, explosions, guns, and slapstick, mild/suggestive language, and strong humor.

There’s also one other video I wanted to show you, the video that gave this post its clever name. This video is the only known TomSka stick-figure video that hasn’t reached a minimum of 10 million hits yet, but I’m not criticizing Tom or any of his fans. If you’ve seen all the videos, you’ve most likely seen a recurring gag: a kid that stares at the camera and says “I like trains.” before being hit by a train. Well, guess what? He got his own video! Known as the “I Like Trains Kid”, the next video is a song about the story of our famous recurring gag, and it’s surpassed 7.5 million hits since September 2011.

Rated E10+ for ages 10 and up for blood, mild violence including trains, and severe humor.

(If you see this, comment “I like trains” in the section below.)

Like what you saw from this post? Go and subscribe to TomSka’s channel and check out more of his stuff! (By the way, all the ASDF Movie installments like “asdfmovie5“, for example, are all fakes. TomSka hasn’t released a fifth ASDFMovie video yet, but in the future, just cross your fingers and hope he will. ) And also like, rate, and comment to our little channels as well, and make sure to hit that subscribe button good, just jump kick it in the face. Come back next Monday for some new awesomeness when I’m now an age older!

– Sam

Hey guys it’s Sam, and if you remember the stuff I keep forgetting about but then unexpectedly revamp later on, you wouldn’t be surprised that I did that exact thing with YouTube Treasures. The last post I made in that series was probably, like, summer 2011. Summer 2011! And as a gift of apology, I’ve decided to bring one of our most beloved series back with a new and hilarious subject. If you love the geniuses behind CollegeHumor, wait until you see their next creation…

Link went through all eight dungeons, losing and finding new hearts, and going through a heck of a lot of Octoroks, just to find out that Zelda's got another man. Okay, now I feel bad for Link instead of Zelda!

The concept for Dorkly actually came round at the start of 2007, and ever since all of the videos have garnered over 35 million views with almost 45,000 people liking its Facebook page. The premise that makes Dorkly such a hit is the manipulation upon our loved video game characters, whether known (Mario, Link, Mega Man, etc.) or not known (Popo and Nana from Ice Climber, for example), making themselves move and talk in various ways, such as trying to get a good deal on a bike, trying to be tutored, or even hanging off the edge of a cliff. This is what made Dorkly the sensation that it is today in the first place. Dorkly is classified as a “video game humor site”, and that’s the best description you can find, since these vids are godtear funny (that’s “swag talk” for “super funny”). Have you wondered what it would be like if you could pay for DLC for the most classic of games with “NES points”? Have you wondered what Legend of Zelda would be like if Link found a Portal gun? Have you ever wanted to see the worst way to open a barrel in Donkey Kong Country? You, my friend, are going to find out.

If Classic Games Had DLC“, released near the end of Nov 2011 with over 80,000 hits, visualizes the question, “What if classic games had DLC?” What if you could use “NES points” to buy stuff like cheesy Yoshi armor, a knife at a bare-knuckle (and chi) brawl, the fourth sacred Tri-force piece, a Mario Kart banana on the go, and even a second Sonic (but as we all know, that’s already taken). Enough with the “what if” questions, though, go on and see the video.

Diddy Kong Barrel Trouble“, released the day before New Year’s Eve 2010 with over half a million hits, visualizes the only way for Donkey Kong to open a barrel in the world of Donkey Kong Country: the wrong way. The way where—oh, sorry, this is the part where you watch the video.

Link to the Past with a Portal Gun“, released near the end of Nov 2011 with almost 80,000 hits, visualizes how A Link to the Past could’ve played out with a Portal gun. As the description states, “When life gives you the Tri-force, make Tri-force grenades.” Link gets creative in many different ways to take down his opponents or save himself from impending doom, but I can’t tell you that, but I can tell you this: Portals + chickens + final boss = ….

Street Fighter Meter Maid“, released near the start of Jan 2011  with almost 700,000 hits, shows what Street Fighter‘s ferociously adorable Blanka would be like as a “meter maid” and how he would cope with parking violations: destroying cars from the outside in. He won’t listen to your complaints, he won’t listen to your story, he just wants you to teach you a lesson from all the car-destroying he did in the Street Fighter series.


Did you like what you saw? Well, check out the real channel and make sure to subscribe if you have a YouTube or Google account! And make sure to subscribe to our little “channel” as well as 2Sam2Mwak! Make sure to like (if you blog at WordPress), tell at least 2 people how awesome this blog is, and stay tuned for more sweet stuff! And thanks for subscribing! With every subscription, I will donate 500 snooze dollars to the Dream World*. With 50,000 hits, that’s 25 million snooze dollars to be donated! Do you know many stomachs of starving Dream World kids will be filled?

– Sam

*You do know that the Dream World and its currency (snooze dollars) exists during my sleep, right?


Hey guys it’s Sam and I’ve dug up yet another valuable YouTube treasure, matey! This is a post fueled of excitement and happiness, so don’t be surprised if I go too crazy. Well, anyway, in the wee ending days of October, my dad and I ordered 5 TechDecks on eBay for about 6 dollars. They would be shipped to our home from November 16th-30th. But what day is it now? And I already have my beautiful TechDecks!

A full examination of the elements of a TechDeck (from left to right): the wheels, the trucks, and the board.

A specifically-described TechDeck would be a miniature skateboard, or a “fingerboard.” It may seem like a boring bare minimum, but almost all the boys in my class used to be addicted to these things. They would trade boards with one another, or even trucks and wheels. But who knew that there were actual fingerboard championships this year, in this country, for a $5,000 cash prize? And who else to announce the grand winner but skating legend Tony Hawk? I tell you, TechDecks are serious stuff. Here are three videos of that championship in their chronological order: the Minneapolis qualifier (almost 30,000 views), the Denver qualifier (almost 25,000 views), and the finals (100,000+ views, which were held just last month in the big NYC!).

Now geeks will definitely be remembered in skateboarding history. But anyway, you can find these all over Walmart, eBay, you name it, TechDecks are there…well, maybe not everywhere. And they go for serious prices, like Walmart forcing it online for over forty big ones! There are actually even park sets like half-pipes and rails available for sale along with TechDecks.


eBay – There are many different prices (the “Buy It Now + Free Shipping” kinds recommended), but the highest ones usually reach peaks of up to sixty dollars.

Walmart – One 4-pack of boards costed 10 dollars, but there are only 14 items in stock when you search up “tech deck”, but they’re all mostly half-pipes and other sets.

Amazon – One 96MM 4-pack of boards costed 15 dollars, but again it’s mostly park sets, with the exclusion of some head-smackingly expensive boards compared to normal.


Check out the site of all finger-skating sites at techdeck.com, and also, if you already own a TechDeck or just want some sourcing guided help, check out these tutorial videos of how to perform tricks like kickflips (almost 253,000 views) or even simple ollies (almost 12,000 views).

So anyway, subscribe, like, comment, oh my! And make sure to get your share of Tech-Decking, and tell me about your finger-boarding history in a comment! Also check by every Friday on 2Sam2Mwak for…ah, you get the point.

Later, gator. After a while, crocodile. See you soon, raccoon.

– Sam


Hey it’s Sam with another great YouTube treasure, mateys! (Why do I keep saying that?) And if you are a modern-day person, don’t watch TV, and/or might not have a life, you may not know Looney Tunes. Be as it may, it may be the most timeless cartoon the networks have ever seen. And now that it’s gotten a 2011 rejuvenation, we now know it with The Looney Tunes Show, bringing every old-school character and possibly converting them into the most new-school people I’ve seen. And that’s what today is about. While we may not be focusing on the show in general, we’re focusing on one of my favorite aspects of the show: “Merrie Melodies”.

This is the title card of the first Merrie Melody from the thirties.

Merrie Melodies are songs (usually 2 min. at most) featuring classic Looney Tunes characters singing original songs. If you don’t ROFL at these videos, then you have no emotion. Hands down. There are actually lots of YouTubers that release TLTS melodies. And I actually give you extra points if you have some of these on iTunes or Windows Media Player (at least a music player in general). Some videos have gotten over 100,000 views while others haven’t, but it’s the song that counts.

This first song is about Chickenhawk, a hawk who loves chicken. Crispy, glazed, baked, fried…come on, he eats chicken cake for his birthday. (130,000 views since May 2011.)

The next song is about Elmer Fudd’s love for grilled cheese sandwiches. I do criticize him, because he rejects a burger, a shake, a cake, and a steak for that cheese! (Now that’s what I call true love.) >:-( 100,000 views since May 2011. )-:<

Another song stars Marvin the Martian, and he sings about how he’s really a good guy despite being from Mars. He shares cheese pizza and lemonade, and–oh, this is the best part–he’s the ultimate host of puppies; he makes them in his lab. (20,000 views since June 2011. And yes…this is Cartoon Network’s channel.)

The final song is a love song. But not any love song. It stars Lola. Yeah, that crazy psycho stalker bunny after Bugs. She tries to tell him he’s in love, but he tries to get out of it in every way possible…even if he has to go tooth-and-nail on her. (Almost 100,000 views since July 2011.)


So for any of you who don’t watch this show yet, I have four reasons why you should. In fact, you just saw them. So catch The Looney Tunes Show Tuesdays at 8:00 on Cartoon Network! It’s actually better than you think…;)

Your blogger,


p.s. This post is dedicated to my friends, Benny and Jerry Kagumba. Why? Because they were the first to witness this awesomeness…and they’ve been with me for years now. So, if you’re reading this, this is in your honor.

Hey guys it’s Sam, sorry for the hiatus, I have been whipping up some new videos with my webcam! 😀 Anyways, I’m back with another YouTube Treasure (sorry if they’re getting old). I know. We’ve been having a YouTube fest. Emma Watson socking an interviewer, a finger frenzy, all the videos I included in my 4th of July celebratory post. I guess, now it’s more LOL! 😉 Now, this treasure is a test. An ultimate test…no, the ultimate test. The hardest challenge you’ll ever take. Harder than the Moron Test, even. Can you sit through these videos without laughing your head off? If you can, you are not only titled “stone hearted”, but you get two legendary Sammwak collectibles: an actual stone heart, and the pork pie hat of Buster Keaton, who in the 1900’s, was known as the “Great Stone Face”!

The videos, in their order, were a 4-second animation of the Rage Guy (published by sr50cent). For Rage fans, this video is hilarious, so why did it get only 130,000 views (since Sep 2010)?! It’s the best 4 seconds of your life; you just don’t know it yet. Sometime in the middle of the night you’ll wake up screaming, “FUUUUUUUUUUUUUU” I just know you will.

The next one was a video from August 2009, with publisher bramslaets daring the viewer to watch it without laughing. (It’s really called, “try to watch this without laughing”. It had 2 years to become the next Nyan Cat, but it only racked up half a million views! How can you not enjoy a prancing rainbow Bunchie? When I first saw this, I was ROFLMFAO. Even Fick said, “Thanks to this video, I dream happy dreams of me dancing with Bunchies on a rainbow, thanks to this video” on Facebrook the other day.

The next one was a scene from the timeless comedy Napoleon Dynamite, when he dances his illegal government ninja butt off! There’s actually an awful lot of copies of the scene, let alone them being remade (one from mauricio890 getting over 2 million views!), but the real one from markthehat66 scored over half a million views since December 2010, which is pretty strong for a 6-month duration of time to get viral. (770,000 to be exact) And according to the video’s page on YouTube, it said that the video was seen on the channel The Stranger, Seattle’s Only Newspaper. Now that would be an article I’d tune into.

A “fans-have-been-waiting-for-this-so-long” video of Joe Jonas dancing to Beyonce’s “Single Ladies” was next, racking up over 25 million views since June 2009 (a 2 week countdown to the release of their album, Lines, Vines, and Trying Times) coincidentally from JonasBrothersMusic. For 2 years for viral possibilities, that has to be one of the biggest online breakthroughs I’ve seen! (Shane Dawson even reacted to it!) It’s like “Bieber After the Dentist”—it had only one viral-possibility year, and look how well it did! 32 million views well!

The penultimate video, an Autotuned remix of CopperCab’s timeless “GINGERS DO HAVE SOULS!!” video, racked up 4 million views since February 2010 (coincidentally my birth month!) thanks to publisher placeboing. This has quickly become my most favorable Autotune remix ever (the grooviest, funniest, and second-shortest too)! And they obviously have to allow downloadable MP3 at Mediafire.com! But this will probably teach you a good message. You’ll wake up at midnight, saying, “Oh, gingers DO have souls!”

The final video, and the oldest, coolest, and EPIC WIN-est, dates all the way back to November 2005 from superbkid! It’s apparently a message, at a theater, before beginning 2005’s Chicken Little (conveniently, released in November!), telling the audience to turn off their phones in the most innovative way possible…Chicken Little dancing his tail feather off to O-Zone’s “Numa Numa”! Then, obviously, his phone rings halfway through the dance which leads him to get smushed. That’s 6 years ago, and it racked up a mind blowing 15 million views!…which is what I expected for a video like this. 😀 😀 😀


So, tell me guys: when did you laugh? (Leave a comment telling me when!) Don’t fake it. I know you cracked up one way or another. If you didn’t…slap yourself upside the head and get a sense of humor, buster! Just kidding…but seriously. If you didn’t crack a smile through the whole show…then congratulations! You have earned this achievement!…

Stone Hearted – Think you got what it takes to complete the ultimate test? Sit through the videos without cracking a smile! (50 BP)

…and these dandy collectible, again, a stone heart… …and the pork pie hat of the Great Stone Face himself, Buster Keaton! Absolutely priceless upon your success!

Check back for more tests, more treasures, and more time with me here at Sammwak!

– Sam

p.s. I’m going to be learning at VBS (Vacation Bible School) this coming week starting tomorrow (which means sleeping 9:00 pm-early >:-o), and this year’s theme is Operation Space! (Last year was The Egypt File, and the year before that was Gadget’s Garage, and so on.) So, first we contacted with God through a teen genius and his robot, then we contacted him in an Egyptian pyramid style, and now we contact with him in an intergalactic style? St. Mike just isn’t running out of ideas. 😉

Hey, it’s Sam, and we’ve dug up another YouTube treasure, mateys! Fans of Harry Potter? This treasure will leave you stupefied for more! Okay, so Hermione–sorry, Emma Watson–is getting interviewed for Prisoner of Azkaban. The interviewer mentions how Hermione “socked it to” Draco in the movie, and a good “sock” it was. And out of nowhere, he says that he wants Emma to punch him. I’m not lying. He really said it. You can even check the video if you want to. I don’t know how many 5-Hour Energies he had to drink to work up the nerve to say that. And amidst his begging, Emma really sucker punches him hard. Even costing him a couple teeth. If the tooth fairy comes tonight, that guy will be a thousandaire tomorrow morning. 😀

I mean seriously, when Muggles get mad, they get mad! Now, this video got almost 4.5 million views since its release back in January 2006 by christmassacre, so we’re all not really surprised how it went viral. Over 5,000 people liked this video, but almost 500 dislikes grew. Why are there any dislikes? Maybe, besides those overprotective parents. And again, the video isn’t even that long, it’s only almost a minute long. And to tie in, I’ll show you the other video of Hermione sucker punching Draco.

Now this video is almost at 50,000 views, so it’s not strongly viral otherwise. Even if it was released last year in April. When Sammwak basically started. But the surprising note of over 100 likes and absolutely no dislikes is a shocker of awesomeness. Good job, Pokehero2009. This mostly got comments about how Hermione did the sock-it-to-em on Draco, and how he deserved it, and how people kept pressing the seven button…

So this is an important life lesson: never mess with a Muggle, let alone Hermione. 😦 I even got this pic sent by her!

So, remember that, and I’ll see you when we dig up our next YouTube treasure! 😉

Later, Sam